About datgamerchick : Jess. Sarcastic Grammar Nazi. That's all you need to know, so you can exit my profile now.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I was talking to my grandpa while he was gardening outside. Suddenly I feel this hard, salty thing fly into my mouth and I spit it out. It turned out to be a beetle. My grandpa takes one look at the beetle and says, "Well, at least that poor bug finally got you to shut up." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17326) - you deserved it (4360)
On 02/20/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by vw (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29959) - you deserved it (4907)
On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States
Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24527) - you deserved it (4389)
Today, after parking my car, I was informed by an incredibly hot girl that my tail light was faulty. I tried hitting it to make it work again. Guess who has 5 stitches and a smashed tail light? FML
I agree, your life sucks (4778) - you deserved it (25301)
On 02/11/2012 at 11:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15669) - you deserved it (7017)
On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands
Today, I had to explain to this really intimidating girl that I wasn't giving her a dirty look, and that it was just my face at rest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16348) - you deserved it (1807)
On 02/07/2012 at 3:39pm - misc - by Emily (woman) - United States
Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10285) - you deserved it (22648)
On 02/05/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by inked - United States (Alabama)
Today, I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7297) - you deserved it (19084)
On 02/04/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by WayTooMuchFacebook (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was using a restroom when I heard someone sneeze. I said, "Bless you." It happened again about three times, so I repeated myself each time. I then noticed it was an automatic air freshener. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11652) - you deserved it (14914)
On 02/03/2012 at 12:25am - misc - by coleslaw (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got punched by a man for making fun of his stutter. I didn't. I stutter too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30795) - you deserved it (1579)
On 02/02/2012 at 11:00pm - misc - by Sam (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got stuck in a revolving door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14698) - you deserved it (6351)
On 02/01/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by pmony - United States (New York)
Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35607) - you deserved it (2776)
On 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm - misc - by sorrygrandma - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, it's my girlfriend's birthday. I presented her with an oil painting of her that I'd been working on for over a month, and she started to cry. I thought it was because she liked it, until she asked if she really looks that ugly and disproportionate in real life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20135) - you deserved it (2428)
On 01/29/2012 at 2:09pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady looked very angry at me and started talking. Then she looked like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently, I'd been stepping on her foot. She decided to poke me in the eye and type, "Now you're blind too." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31268) - you deserved it (2025)
On 01/28/2012 at 7:46pm - misc - by Come on - United States
Today, I passed out in the shower with my boyfriend. He just left me there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21640) - you deserved it (3464)
On 01/26/2012 at 2:09pm - love - by soawkward - Canada (Quebec)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
