About datgamerchick : Jess. I'm 19, and I like funny things. Good grammar is sexy.
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datgamerchick's favorite FMLs
Today, I made a half-hour bike ride to the movie store, only to realize I'd forgotten my money. I made the ride back home, grabbed my money, went back to the store, paid, then made a second ride home. I got home exhausted, and opened the case. They gave me the wrong movie. FML
by CPD / 10/15/2011 at 12:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my family. It was going well until my 23 year old sister started telling him in detail about her constipation and that if she doesn't take a shit in a few days, it's going to come out of her mouth. FML
by Lauren / 10/12/2011 at 1:55pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by octoberrain / 10/12/2011 at 11:41am / United States / Animals
by spoiled22 / 10/12/2011 at 3:17am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by top dog! / 10/11/2011 at 4:05pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
by Username / 10/03/2011 at 1:58pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, there was a guy following me, so to avoid him, I crouched down and basically waddled behind a wall to get past him. Sure enough, first thing I see when I get around the corner, while still waddling, was an unhappy midget couple staring right at me. FML
by Mike Polk / 10/03/2011 at 8:37am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML
by Kayt / 10/03/2011 at 12:38am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by Steve / 09/30/2011 at 6:18am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Transportation
by BigBananaLover / 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by sadkid / 09/25/2011 at 7:23pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a science test. A question asked, "What is the first stage of photosynthesis?" I didn't know, so just trying to be light-hearted, I wrote, "The plant must first believe in itself." My teacher didn't think it was funny, and gave me detention for insulting her intelligence. FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2011 at 12:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was expecting my period. To avoid the embarrassment of everyone in the office finding out, instead of putting tampons in my bag, I hid one in my bra. It fell out while I was coming back from lunch. I am now known to all as "The Tampon Dispenser". FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2011 at 9:55am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/21/2011 at 2:39pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML
by f_ck_U / 09/21/2011 at 2:47am / China (Zhejiang) / Work