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danis

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danis

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 March 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1982
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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danis's page activity

Visits<b>NotAUser</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 6:36am<b>_Slenderman_</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 6:55pm<b>Jthewat</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 7:08pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 9:03pm<b>hippo1234</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:47pm<b>curticus</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 8:28pm<b>horsehaed7</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 4:11am<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:50pm<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 7:55pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 9:41am<b>flupsht</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 11:53pm<b>Thorvald22</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 1:58am<b>redwill85</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 1:03pm<b>Zz_I_Raditz</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 1:40pm<b>SarMarJo</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 3:21am<b>sazaraa</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 2:04am<b>Redthetrainer</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 10:24pm<b>GuyNoOneKnows</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 12:09am

danis's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of danis's badges

danis's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my mom if I was ugly. She said, "Ask your girlfriend." I said I don't have one. She said "Exactly." FML

#20855163
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48123) - you deserved it (4825)

On 08/26/2013 at 2:22pm - misc - by Miami6and3 - United States (California)

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, while discussing career prospects with my mom, she suggested that I become a penis puppeteer, because "Let's face it, you play with it 24/7. Why not make a career out of it?" Yeah, thanks. FML

#20838688
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35620) - you deserved it (11855)

On 08/15/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by kaynotentirelywrong (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, a guest of the private beach club I work at asked if I could do something about the water temperature in the ocean. I laughed, thinking it was a joke. She was serious and complained to my boss, saying I was absolutely no help. FML

#20837266
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42259) - you deserved it (2600)

On 08/14/2013 at 3:47pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

#20835942
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48017) - you deserved it (17144)

On 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by ANON (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mum picked up a bunch of tissues that were scattered around my room. She examined them, then asked me to stop wasting her potential grandchildren. FML

#20825949
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48829) - you deserved it (39975)

On 08/07/2013 at 6:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Egypt

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

#20823279
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45083) - you deserved it (8839)

On 08/06/2013 at 2:19am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up at 6am and went into the kitchen, where I saw a mouse in front of the fridge. Petrified, I stood in the doorway shooing it for a few minutes. My husband then walked into the kitchen, picked up the "mouse", and threw it in the bin. It was a used tea bag. FML

#20823044
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36975) - you deserved it (17794)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:01am - animals - by Tea_baggins (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I stepped out of the house for some fresh air. It was still dark out, so imagine my horror when I accidentally stepped on a frog. It squealed for a split second before being crushed beneath my uncovered foot. FML

#20822322
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43189) - you deserved it (6122)

On 08/05/2013 at 4:21pm - animals - by traumatizedforlife (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter's biggest aspiration is to create a time machine for the sole purpose of going to the '70s to see the Ramones in concert. FML

#20810453
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33094) - you deserved it (8349)

On 07/29/2013 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40260) - you deserved it (27219)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband was chased out of a bar after he was seen slipping something into a woman's drink. I was the woman, the 'something' was aspirin, and that's the last time we ever try to role-play. FML

#20798724
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47879) - you deserved it (26828)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in a restroom, reading this site, when another gentleman walked in. He washed his hands, dried them, nodded at me, then left. It wouldn't ordinarily be so weird, except I was in a one-person restroom. FML

#20784458
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48725) - you deserved it (8101)

On 07/15/2013 at 3:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I placed a Bible app next to an app I use for porn, in the hope that it will encourage me to watch less porn. I'm a girl. FML

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52826) - you deserved it (9139)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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