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Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (21858) - you totally deserved it (2982)
On 11/02/2009 at 3:39pm - kids - by Chubby (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)
Today, at work we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7598) - you totally deserved it (32604)
On 10/28/2009 at 6:29pm - work - by R (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)
Today, I realized that acne is a major side effect of a medication I'm taking. The medication is to help me with my anxiety. The acne is creating more anxiety. And the more anxious I get, the more meds I need. And the more my face breaks out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23353) - you totally deserved it (2661)
On 10/17/2009 at 2:26am - health - by JoJo - United States (Iowa)
Today, while meeting guys from my dad's work, they told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21600) - you totally deserved it (3901)
On 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by SheWentCrayola (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, it was the first day of fall break from college, and I was really excited to sleep in and relax the entire weekend. Apparently my boss caught wind of my happiness and scheduled me 8am-2pm each day of break, "seeing how I don't have anything else to do." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18081) - you totally deserved it (1874)
On 10/16/2009 at 2:22pm - work - by cbrocks (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my girlfriend and I were fooling around on camera. I was mostly naked and putting on a show for her, when I noticed that she was looking off to the side instead of where she normally looks when she's talking to me. She was playing solitaire on her computer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5573) - you totally deserved it (1432)
On 10/16/2009 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by DamnThatsHarsh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, a woman yelled at me to stop following her around the store. We were in IKEA. The only way to get through the store is to follow the arrows through a one-way path. Apparently, no one informed her of this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17708) - you totally deserved it (932)
On 10/14/2009 at 2:19pm - misc - by creepystalkerguy (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my little sister asked what masturbation was. We where having a family dinner with my grandparents. My mother then said, "Why don't you ask your brother? He is a pro." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12962) - you totally deserved it (2862)
On 09/28/2009 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by namhtor (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I had my first day off in weeks. I was excited about getting to sleep in, until my boss called me at 6:30 in the morning to remind me I didn't have to come into work. Thanks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24381) - you totally deserved it (1582)
On 09/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by NoSleep (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found some charges on my credit card for two round trip tickets to Las Vegas. Turns out my daughter and her stoner, unemployed boyfriend stole my credit card and flew to Vegas over the weekend to get married. I paid for my daughter's elopement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26672) - you totally deserved it (2050)
On 09/13/2009 at 7:10pm - kids - by Broeman (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9935) - you totally deserved it (44317)
On 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by waterproblem (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to an underwear shop, and an employee recommended me a push-up bra. I was wearing one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9203) - you totally deserved it (512)
On 01/17/2009 at 6:31am - misc - by Pakundo - France (Ile-de-France)
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