dani22097

Search for a member

dani22097

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1094
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

dani22097's page activity

Visits<b>xxBagelxx</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 11:31am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 10:34am<b>Phaeno</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 8:31pm<b>JesusOfNazareth</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 12:13am<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 2:18am<b>everythingisrosi</b> - the 12/10/2010 at 3:09am<b>angrynegro7</b> - the 12/07/2010 at 7:06pm<b>zp5</b> - the 12/06/2010 at 10:11pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:34pm

dani22097's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

dani22097's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

by Beeisc00l / 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm / Reserved / Animals

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

by ouch / 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

by verasam01 / 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom and took a massive piss. Then I actually woke up, well and truly soaked. FML

by JustADream / 02/24/2011 at 1:29am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

by Someone / 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML

by thissucks / 02/21/2011 at 5:20pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally taught my mom how to text message people. Now I get a message from her every 30 seconds saying "Hi". FML

by moweezy9 / 02/21/2011 at 4:07pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister lost a leg. Immediately after hearing the news, my boyfriend started cracking jokes about getting her a job at IHOP. FML

Today, my mum got an electric car. It's so quiet that we could hear the bones of my cat break as we reversed over it on the driveway. FML

by flattened / 02/10/2011 at 5:58am / Animals

Today, I found out that even though my sister and I are identical twins, I'm known as "The ugly one". FML

by 5minsolder / 02/07/2011 at 8:21pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on the phone to a guy I really like from work. We'd been talking for about 2 minutes, when he said he was getting another call, and put me on hold. I was so excited to be on the phone with him, it took me a whole 15 minutes to realise he had actually just hung up on me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2011 at 4:14pm / United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute) / Miscellaneous

Today, my extremely superstitious girlfriend called me and said she couldn't make it to the date I had planned tonight. Her reason? "I sense something horrible is going to happen." I was planning to propose. FML

by fianceeless / 01/20/2011 at 8:15pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2011 at 1:35pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm / Belgium / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad’s best friend, who has been his business associate for the past 28 years, took me to a Star Wars store for my 18th birthday. He put on a Darth Vader helmet, and imitating his voice, said: "I am your father." I laughed. It wasn’t a joke. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 4:53am / France / Miscellaneous