dandlyon

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dandlyon

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 September 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1157
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About dandlyon : i'm one of a kind. laksjdfieadf

*w*

dandlyon's page activity

Visits<b>phamalocity</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 4:10am<b>whiplash2289</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 6:55pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 01/09/2012 at 11:58am<b>smartalek</b> - the 07/11/2011 at 12:22am<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 12:45am<b>22jrdn55</b> - the 08/30/2009 at 3:31am<b>lulWTF</b> - the 07/06/2009 at 4:21pm<b>MeganH0LLYW00D</b> - the 06/28/2009 at 4:10pm

dandlyon's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

dandlyon's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

by Soapy / 06/28/2009 at 3:23am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

by a_B_c_D_e_F_g / 06/27/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I went to announce to my son that I am pregnant again. After I told him, he looks up and yells: "fuck this shit!" and walks out of the room. My son is nine years old. FML

by poormom / 06/27/2009 at 12:05am / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my crush came to my house to watch movies with me. We were sitting on the couch when he turned to me and said that he had had a dream about me the night before. I moved in to kiss him, thinking he liked me. He then added that I had fallen of a cliff and he had pissed himself laughing. FML

by Mojo_Jojo / 06/13/2009 at 7:01am / China (Beijing) / Love

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

by quadropheniac / 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

by Higgs / 06/02/2009 at 3:10pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML

by dumbo / 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

by keeks_25 / 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I got up at 8am and didn't take a shower so I could hear the postman at the door. He never came. I stink. FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2008 at 4:24am / Australia / Miscellaneous