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dandlyon

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dandlyon
  • Town/Country : chicago, us
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 September 1992 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 566
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About dandlyon : i'm one of a kind. laksjdfieadf

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dandlyon's favorite FMLs

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

#3297197 (260)

I agree, your life sucks (8652) - you deserved it (37171)

On 06/28/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Soapy (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. I opened my eyes to see his eyes fixed on something else. I turned my head to see what was so interesting. He was on his iPhone looking up recipes for things to wrap in bacon. FML

#3271801 (250)

I agree, your life sucks (46340) - you deserved it (5016)

On 06/27/2009 at 10:29am - love - by a_B_c_D_e_F_g (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to announce to my son that I am pregnant again. After I told him, he looks up and yells: "fuck this shit!" and walks out of the room. My son is nine years old. FML

#3261545 (235)

I agree, your life sucks (50763) - you deserved it (18616)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:05am - kids - by poormom (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

#3146320 (459)

I agree, your life sucks (137016) - you deserved it (19610)

On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my crush came to my house to watch movies with me. We were sitting on the couch when he turned to me and said that he had had a dream about me the night before. I moved in to kiss him, thinking he liked me. He then added that I had fallen of a cliff and he had pissed himself laughing. FML

#2853235 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (40107) - you deserved it (4232)

On 06/13/2009 at 7:01am - love - by Mojo_Jojo (woman) - China (Beijing)

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

#2740699 (371)

I agree, your life sucks (90324) - you deserved it (4758)

On 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm - intimacy - by quadropheniac (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

#2534485 (423)

I agree, your life sucks (51813) - you deserved it (3954)

On 06/02/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Higgs (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML

#2405054 (256)

I agree, your life sucks (41659) - you deserved it (6001)

On 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking: "What can I get for you cuntie?" FML

#1751488 (192)

I agree, your life sucks (60641) - you deserved it (16264)

On 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm - work - by keeks_25 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got up at 8am and didn't take a shower so I could hear the postman at the door. He never came. I stink. FML

#14 (70)

I agree, your life sucks (10861) - you deserved it (49298)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:24am - misc - by Cyberdeeder -



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