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dandee_one

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dandee_one

1Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 931
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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dandee_one's page activity

Visits<b>SouL_WraitH</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 3:05pm<b>Vexatious</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 11:22pm<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 6:15pm<b>EKDH</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 11:03pm<b>17031990</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 1:38pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 1:16pm<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 11:56pm<b>ShadowOpsV4</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 11:56am<b>midnight_tiger</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 3:40pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 6:33am<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 4:28pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 9:32pm<b>hereicomment</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 11:39pm<b>NotAWalnut</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 9:48pm<b>olpally</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 10:59pm<b>unicornhanna</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 4:44pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 12:55pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 12:07pm

Fucked!<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 12:15am

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dandee_one's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a job interview, and my father in law's house. As soon as I got home I went to the bathroom and noticed my bloody pantyliner had fallen out at one of these places. I don't know which one is worse. FML

#21428990
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23754) - you deserved it (2388)

On 06/20/2015 at 10:03am - misc - by organizse - United States (Texas)

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (134) - you deserved it (30)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML

#21344889
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15256) - you deserved it (25644)

On 01/27/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by katrina2d (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to deal with numerous complaints about an employee washing their genitals in the communal bathroom sink. Nothing in the HR manual prepared me for this. FML

Today, I was playing what became an extremely intense game of hide-and-seek with my best friend's sister. I finally found the perfect place, so I slid down into the bath and began to cover myself. She popped up out of nowhere and said, "FOUND YOU!" I got so scared that I punched her in the face. FML

#21325704
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28754) - you deserved it (7187)

On 12/28/2014 at 4:07am - kids - by angryman -

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

#21313211
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39110) - you deserved it (4004)

On 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm - kids - by terdberglerforlyfe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I went to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family. I watched as my uncle and his girlfriend snuck off to the bathroom together, where they stayed until someone else tried to get in. When they came out, she was wiping her mouth. I need new eyes. FML

#21306928
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36285) - you deserved it (3059)

On 11/27/2014 at 3:38pm - intimacy - by Trainer Calypso - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, some idiot introduced my grandmother to yoga pants. FML

#21306857
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33953) - you deserved it (3204)

On 11/27/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28839) - you deserved it (3452)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I woke myself up by letting out a long fart. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't fallen asleep while on jury duty. FML

#21299443
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29749) - you deserved it (8063)

On 11/15/2014 at 8:25am - misc - by That_Indian_Guy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend pretended to be reading braille while touching my chest acne. FML

#21295903
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40759) - you deserved it (6961)

On 11/10/2014 at 12:01am - intimacy - by annababyyyy - United States (Maryland)

Today, while having some "personal" time, I felt intense pleasure and moaned. I learned that my own moaning prevents me from reaching my peak. I'm my own turn off. FML

#21290790
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38443) - you deserved it (6139)

On 11/02/2014 at 8:31pm - intimacy - by SelfServiced - United States (California)

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

#21288518
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29907) - you deserved it (25106)

On 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I finally felt ready to give my boyfriend a blowjob. Barely 20 seconds in, he said: "I'll be honest, this is TERRIBLE." FML

#21285558
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40511) - you deserved it (8716)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:25am - intimacy - by soisblueballsdickhead (woman) - United States

Today, I was asked to order a new lockable cash tin for work. When my boss returned to ask which one I'd selected, I said, "An 8-inch black one". Her giggle said it all. FML

#21265697
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32676) - you deserved it (6283)

On 09/26/2014 at 9:03am - work - by dicksonthebrain (woman) - United Kingdom



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