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dancinwookie

Offline (the 12/20/2014 at 10:05pm) | Search for a member

dancinwookie

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 February 1984 (30 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7729
  • Number of comments : 245
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About dancinwookie : I'm a walking non-sequitur. I try to spread sunshine, so, please, don't piss on my parade. You can message me, but it might take me a little bit to respond. I love rainbows more than I can verbally express. Sometimes I give just the absolute worst advice on here, because the outcome that is playing in my head is beyond ridiculously funny. My humor is imagination based.

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Visits<b>katefleck77</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 7:32am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 7:04am<b>tiberhits</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 4:31am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:19am<b>NJSchreck</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 4:12pm<b>jensensfuckbuddy</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 10:07am<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 12:07am<b>CloudBustah</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 1:01am<b>Alikia96</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 3:11am<b>trellz17</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 12:51pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 4:04am<b>pinkpig23</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 3:47pm<b>AwkwardShoe</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 1:55pm<b>NachoYoda</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 10:48pm<b>TdotMaria</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 5:01pm<b>sonshadsil94</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 1:56pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 7:45pm<b>mohamed_H</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 10:23am

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dancinwookie's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

#18554140
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11760) - you deserved it (29353)

On 12/19/2011 at 3:57pm - work - by Bob smith (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31064) - you deserved it (2409)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out the hard way what it sounds like when you take the first letter of my first name, A, and put it with my last name, Hole. FML

#18533442
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23325) - you deserved it (3387)

On 12/17/2011 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML

#18517264
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25812) - you deserved it (2548)

On 12/15/2011 at 1:57am - work - by Username - United States (California)

Today, after getting rear ended by a car, I texted my husband to let him know I was in the hospital. His response? "I'm at Taco Bell." FML

#18515573
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28441) - you deserved it (2988)

On 12/14/2011 at 10:34pm - misc - by Mariah Heimann - United States (Illinois)

Today, after my roommate decided to become a vegetarian, her new food choices are making her pass deadly, nauseating gas all night. We have a busted window that won't open. I'm afraid I may not live to see tomorrow morning. FML

#18467127
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27374) - you deserved it (2207)

On 12/09/2011 at 7:23am - misc - by pinkleopleurodon - United States

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11479) - you deserved it (89043)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

#18464488
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8187) - you deserved it (72893)

On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

#18439975
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15070) - you deserved it (40095)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML

#18439868
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25524) - you deserved it (5094)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, after three days of getting stared at by my neighbour from the window, I realized that she wasn't alive anymore. FML

#18406735
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44721) - you deserved it (3369)

On 12/01/2011 at 9:02pm - health - by unknown52 - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

#18404973
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40108) - you deserved it (9450)

On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband asked me if I was really pregnant or if I was just smuggling cheeseburgers. I'm now referred to as "the hamburgler." I'm only 5 months pregnant. FML

#18393059
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28063) - you deserved it (3428)

On 11/30/2011 at 9:57am - love - by preggers - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my fiancé insists that instead of kissing at the crucial moment of our wedding ceremony, we should give each other a high five. FML

#18392410
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40327) - you deserved it (5614)

On 11/30/2011 at 6:17am - love - by no low five (woman) - United States



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