dancinwookie

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Offline (the 05/09/2015 at 1:32am)

dancinwookie

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 February 1984 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14983
  • Number of comments : 246
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About dancinwookie : I'm a walking non-sequitur. I try to spread sunshine, so, please, don't piss on my parade. You can message me, but it might take me a little bit to respond. I love rainbows more than I can verbally express. Sometimes I give just the absolute worst advice on here, because the outcome that is playing in my head is beyond ridiculously funny. My humor is imagination based.

dancinwookie's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 11:05pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 1:48pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:38am<b>Frowny</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 10:37pm<b>Incroyalzz</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 3:36pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 2:03pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 6:40pm<b>Cezll</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 3:24pm<b>skyironsword</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 12:37pm<b>iluvmonkeys</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 11:06pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 9:58am<b>WelshLeachy</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 5:57am<b>pete9913</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 9:55am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 2:47am<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 12:17pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 12:57pm<b>sky413</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 12:26am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 2:57pm

Fucked!<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 6:17pm<b>bugmenotmofo</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 5:03pm<b>fakedsincerity</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 1:52am<b>hippodankamus</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:48am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 1:42am

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dancinwookie's favorite FMLs

Today, I attended an elderly man's funeral. As I approached the casket his wife said, "Thank you for coming." I replied with, "No, thank you." FML

by me / 01/24/2012 at 10:40pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

by MakesMeLol / 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a band concert and my mum got kicked out. She screamed "BORING!" in the middle of it. FML

by katie876 / 01/14/2012 at 8:34am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML

by ThatOneGirl646 / 01/11/2012 at 7:49pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, after 3 hours in a cramped car with my family, we stopped at a gas station. I got out of the car and the first words out of my mouth were, "It feels so good to be able to walk!" That's when I noticed the elderly man sitting in a wheelchair only a few meters away. FML

by VerbalDiarrhea / 01/08/2012 at 2:34am / United States (Nevada) / Transportation

Today, my mother thought it would be a good idea to tell me that I was conceived on an airplane toilet. FML

by Gemma / 01/06/2012 at 6:16pm / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Intimacy

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

by lorahayes / 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2012 at 1:43am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was pushed over and robbed in a parking lot by a man in an ugly Christmas sweater. When I looked up, I was too distracted by the sweater to even look at his face. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2012 at 12:40am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife was about to take a shower, when she called me into the bathroom. She stripped me off and pulled me in with her. As I started to get into it, she sighed, "Thank god. You really needed a shower." FML

by mark / 12/31/2011 at 12:40pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I learned if you've slept with your soon to be step-brother you should tell your family. If you don't, he may blurt it out while drunk at a family barbecue. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2011 at 1:06am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my daughter eating a handful of styrofoam packing pellets, because she thought they were Christmas candy. She's fourteen. What's next, eating rocks? FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2011 at 1:23pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I said something grammatically wrong during it. He chose to correct it. FML

by Nicki / 12/21/2011 at 7:30am / Canada / Intimacy

Today, it was my first day working as a nightclub bartender. All through the evening, a really creepy bloke stood in a dark corner and leered at the girls on the dance floor. When I took the bouncer to one side to let him know, he told me the man was a coat stand. FML

by Bob smith / 12/19/2011 at 3:57pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Work

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

by scammed / 12/18/2011 at 12:18am / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous