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Offline (the 05/09/2015 at 1:32am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 February 1984 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11244
  • Number of comments : 246
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About dancinwookie : I'm a walking non-sequitur. I try to spread sunshine, so, please, don't piss on my parade. You can message me, but it might take me a little bit to respond. I love rainbows more than I can verbally express. Sometimes I give just the absolute worst advice on here, because the outcome that is playing in my head is beyond ridiculously funny. My humor is imagination based.

dancinwookie's page activity

Visits<b>skyironsword</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 12:37pm<b>iluvmonkeys</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 11:06pm<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 9:58am<b>WelshLeachy</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 5:57am<b>pete9913</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 9:55am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 2:47am<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 12:17pm<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 12:57pm<b>sky413</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 12:26am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 2:57pm<b>UkeSenpai</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:34am<b>potionowl</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:22am<b>fakedsincerity</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 7:51pm<b>LilsBills300</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 12:51pm<b>exitium16</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 9:14am<b>alwaysstabbing</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 5:27am<b>hippodankamus</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 8:48pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 7:55pm

Fucked!<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 6:17pm<b>bugmenotmofo</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 5:03pm<b>fakedsincerity</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 1:52am<b>hippodankamus</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:48am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 1:42am

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dancinwookie's favorite FMLs

Today, after being together for only 2 weeks, my boyfriend got me a year's gym membership for my birthday in a card that said, "So u can b hott! Luv u!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (31138) - you deserved it (5872)

On 02/19/2013 at 5:47pm - love - by katwingz (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML


I agree, your life sucks (48189) - you deserved it (5281)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:09am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while at church, I received a text from my girlfriend, saying, "It's not working. We're over." Not only was my phone not on silent mode, I was sitting directly beside my now ex-girlfriend. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35424) - you deserved it (4239)

On 02/17/2013 at 5:44pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Hungary (Szeged)

Today, my father gave me his blessing to be married on one condition: that I keep my maiden name when I marry. My fiancé thought it would be "epic". My last name will be hyphenated to Cobb-Webb. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34863) - you deserved it (5819)

On 02/16/2013 at 10:27am - love - by MsCobb - United States (Ohio)

Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML


I agree, your life sucks (13893) - you deserved it (56209)

On 02/14/2013 at 2:39am - misc - by assoutofuandme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I've been living in Kenya in a nasty apartment for so long that when I looked down into my drink and saw a dead fly, I just picked it out and continued drinking. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32532) - you deserved it (5305)

On 02/13/2013 at 5:04pm - misc - by kenyaliving - Kenya

Today, I finished my shift at the nursing home. There was too much snow on the roads, so most of us had to stay overnight. Not only did I not get to go home, I also got stuck sleeping in the same bed that a resident had died in the night before. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33985) - you deserved it (2325)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:20pm - work - by death bed (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking to my dorm room while it was snowing heavily. I saw a girl in a wheelchair trying to get up a slippery incline. Being a good person, I asked to help. I'm a pretty weak guy, and I couldn't push her up. She wheeled away crying because she thought she was fat. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38284) - you deserved it (5780)

On 02/12/2013 at 11:57pm - misc - by IMadeAHandicappedPersonCry - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I got my very first yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34364) - you deserved it (2849)

On 02/12/2013 at 6:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after spending six months completely repainting and redecorating our new home, I finally finished the last touches and went to remove the masking tape. Off came the tape, along with huge blotches of plasterwork. FML


Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML


Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35106) - you deserved it (8636)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I watched The Passion of the Christ with my girlfriend. She kept scoffing at what she called the "historical inaccuracies", and actually tried to convince me that Hitler killed Jesus. When I corrected her, she looked at me, mouth agape, as if I was insane. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34542) - you deserved it (4945)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:44pm - love - by and she doesn't even give bjs (man) - Argentina (Distrito Federal)

Today, my friend asked me to fix his laptop for him because it is loaded with viruses. When I turned it on and started searching for the problem, I couldn't find it. Luckily I was able to find a video of him banging my girlfriend. We've been together for eight years. FML


I agree, your life sucks (73016) - you deserved it (4255)

On 02/04/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by hamandegger (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33523) - you deserved it (4578)

On 02/03/2013 at 6:04pm - love - by FUCK GOD (man) - Argentina (Salta)

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  • Hardcore will never die, but you will. We’re back with some rock n roll, or dare I say it, some punk rock. Don't run away, it's not that terrible stuff that emo kids listen to while slashing their…

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