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dabx14's favorite FMLs
Today, I finished my shift at the nursing home. There was too much snow on the roads, so most of us had to stay overnight. Not only did I not get to go home, I also got stuck sleeping in the same bed that a resident had died in the night before. FML
by death bed / 02/13/2013 at 12:20pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
by almostkilledmyself / 12/29/2012 at 2:30am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous
Today, feeling very distant to my daughter recently, I decided to sneak a peek in her diary to see what was on her mind. The book was apparently one of those that play the sound of a woman screaming when opened improperly, and alerted everyone in the house to my actions. FML
by Anonymous / 12/08/2012 at 2:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went out for lunch with a guy I hadn't seen in a couple of months. He seemed to be staring at my chest quite a bit, but I wasn't too bothered by it. Turns out there was still an XL sticker on my shirt. FML
by distracted / 09/16/2012 at 3:00am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
by FullMonty / 09/15/2012 at 7:26pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
Today, I woke up feeling ecstatic, because last night, my crush had told my best friend he likes me a lot. I sent him a text message telling him the feeling is mutual. A little while after sending it, it hit me that his confession had only been part of a dream. FML
by hannah / 09/15/2012 at 6:16pm / New Zealand (Marlborough) / Love
Today, I got mad at my parents and threatened to run away. Things got so bad that I packed a bag and left, planning to hide in my front yard to teach them a lesson. It's been two hours, and I'm still standing behind a bush in front of my house while they make no effort to look for me. FML
by Rowan Curry / 09/15/2012 at 11:37am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/15/2012 at 7:36am / United States (Delaware) / Health
by onorexveritas / 09/06/2012 at 12:54pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, I was in a terrific mood after finding a bouquet of beautiful flowers on my doorstep when I came home. That is, until I recognised the handwriting of my "secret admirer" was the same as my mother's. FML
by mfnfhdjdjddjsjfn / 09/03/2012 at 4:39am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
by ugly / 09/03/2012 at 4:17am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 09/02/2012 at 7:47pm / United States / Intimacy
by rotezora / 09/02/2012 at 8:44am / Switzerland (Basel-Stadt) / Love
by pride? what's that? :( / 08/31/2012 at 8:23pm / Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant) / Intimacy
Today, I got married. My booze-hound mother made a toast, and told a story about how she once walked in on us having sex. My husband's family is very religious, and we told them we weren't having sex until marriage. Thanks mom. FML
by gotta love my momma / 08/28/2012 at 1:08am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…