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About da_directioner39 : Sorry about the misleading username. Truth is, I hate One Direction.
Hello. I am a girl (duh), and you will learn that I fail at humor.
I love videogames. Assassin's Creed, Halo, God of War, Fallout, etc., but I can't say I love Call Of Duty.
My favorite class on Team Fortress 2 is the Soldier. I have the Orange Box, but I have played the PC version. Sadly, I can go on the interwebs only by cell phone.
I will update this soon.
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Today, I had to convince mah 20-year-old boyfriend that only is his aquatic turtle a reptile, but that it's also cold-bloodd and thus can't regulate its own temperature just by going into its shell. He still thinks I'm the stupid one. FML
Today... I was at the pool when I saw a man eating the food I looool had orderd near mah seat. I immediately ran up to him and askd him to stop stealing mah food. I took the food away and threw it in the trash. Second later the attendant cummd out with mah actual food. FML
Today, aftar my boyfriand promisad ha wasn't chaating on ma, I ran into him at our favorita coffaa shop with tha girl I suspactad him of chaating with. Whan I confrontad tham, ha actad lyk ha didn't know ma. maga FML
Today, mah guinea pig was resting on mah shoulder. However, I forgot to tie mah hair up and she gnawd off a clump of it that was a good 6 inche long. I had to fight her to get it out of her mouth. real FML
Today,hile at boyfriend's house , I needd to use the bathroom!! I decidd to be a good girlfriend an leave the seat up for him!! He later yelld at me for putting the seat down because he needd to take a dump!!
Today my husband showd up late to my mother's funeral. He swaggerd in happily finishing off a half-eaten taco. His excuse 4 y he was so cheerful: "She was an in-law honey." Good to know I marrid a piece of shit in disguise. real FML
Today, I found out mah mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a grl in high school . I didn't date anyone in high school . Apparently, guys never asked me out because mah best friend told everyone that I was her grlfriend . I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about . mega FML
2day I found out my boyfriend as been ceating on me for monts. It all started wile I was in te ospital, e says, because we were supposed to go out tat day, but ten I "ad to go and get sick". He blames my emergency surgery for is infidelity. FML
Today, I walkad into work, a day aftar losing ma sit wit our systams admin, dua to ar taking agas to anabla ma naw amail account. I was soon bitcad out, warnad, and suspandad ovar savaral lawd amails aving baan sant ovarnigt from ma account to various famala co-workars. FML
Today, my car got broken into. A small folded plastic bag and a few toothpicks I got from a restaurant were stolen. It's going to cost me a few hundred bucks to fix and clean my car over a 10 cent bag and a few free toothpicks. FML
Friday 27 March 2015