About criminalmind : I'm either on FML, playing Fallout: New Vegas or watching porn
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criminalmind's favorite FMLs
Today, it's memorial day weekend. The cops are all over the place watching for speeders and drunks. Some complete dickhead decided to spray paint "cop killa" on the side of my car. It won't come off. FML
by mperh / 05/28/2011 at 8:46am / United States / Transportation
by valerie / 05/27/2011 at 9:04pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 05/27/2011 at 10:00am / Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest) / Miscellaneous
by Derp-A-Herp / 05/27/2011 at 1:46am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I made a fresh juice for a customer. He called the cops because the juice was too acidic for him. He sat in a corner and waited for two hours for them to arrive. Obviously, they didn't turn up. So he yelled at me and left. FML
by Alice / 05/27/2011 at 1:46am / Australia (New South Wales) / Work
by nrelavender / 05/25/2011 at 10:48pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals
by asnolt / 05/24/2011 at 6:29pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by LimeyGoodteeth / 05/24/2011 at 5:34pm / United Kingdom (Leicester) / Work
by 11lyss1 / 05/23/2011 at 12:26am / Work
Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML
by lemonhead / 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm / Health
by quickfingers100 / 05/22/2011 at 5:31am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by Devon / 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
by esoog / 05/19/2011 at 1:38pm / United States (California) / Transportation
by 613tanner / 05/19/2011 at 1:30am / Transportation
by thoughtitwasspecial / 05/18/2011 at 1:15am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy