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Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8344) - you totally deserved it (35744)
On 06/18/2009 at 9:32am - misc - by OompaLoompa (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I was at an awards dinner. I whispered in my wifes ear that she looked really pretty. She whispered in my ear that I should stop clapping so loud because I was embarrassing her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30329) - you totally deserved it (4020)
On 06/06/2009 at 6:24am - love - by Discostu80 - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my bank card was skimmed (copied electronically) and my account was totally cleaned out. I had only just got paid and don't get paid again for 4 weeks. The bank says it will take 21 days minimum to resolve. They offered me a credit card with a huge interest rate to help me get by. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36564) - you totally deserved it (1033)
On 06/02/2009 at 9:33pm - money - by Anonymous - Australia (South Australia)
Today, my family returned from a holiday in Egypt. A holiday that I really wanted to spend with them. As if leaving me behind wasn't bad enough, they then made me watch a 200 picture slideshow of how much fun they had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32582) - you totally deserved it (1880)
On 05/23/2009 at 7:51am - misc - by MdT (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)
Today, my parents came to visit me at the ranch I work at. They're scared to death of horses, but I was explaining how they are almost completely harmless. I was showing them how to work around the horse without getting kicked. As they relaxed, the horse kicked me. I now have a broken leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40698) - you totally deserved it (5405)
On 03/25/2009 at 7:43pm - health - by Owned (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was arrested because my 6 year old son called the police saying that I was hitting my wife and that she was crying. My wife and I were having making love. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74350) - you totally deserved it (5439)
On 03/25/2009 at 7:11pm - love - by david (man) - United States (California)
Today, when I was at my girlfriend's house, I farted and blamed it on the cat. I forgot the cat died 2 weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2107) - you totally deserved it (13575)
On 01/28/2009 at 8:05pm - misc - by kittydead - Canada (Ontario)
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