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cparrenas

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cparrenas

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 March 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1895
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About cparrenas : Awesome.

cparrenas's page activity

Visits<b>DerpyDerpinator</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 2:02am<b>Almost_Positive</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 3:47pm<b>InDoctorWeTrust</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:54am<b>badlukbryan22</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 9:27am<b>king_waldoVII</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 4:45pm<b>star14394</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 12:42am<b>Undecided_Jesus</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 5:40pm<b>seninaa</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 1:26pm<b>mrlawlor777</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 6:11pm<b>davlosthisid42</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 10:57pm<b>tabertooth</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 4:14pm<b>jasonmar</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 9:04am<b>sexymothafucka</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 10:03am<b>Sinlessgore</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 1:19am<b>harry2hopes</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 3:56pm<b>stevenJB</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 11:30am<b>mangoboy1</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 3:24pm<b>samcgee</b> - the 07/18/2012 at 3:34am

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It’s in the can

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cparrenas's favorite FMLs

Today, I learnd that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learnd this first-hand when mah 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

#20442461
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18894) - you deserved it (6696)

On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a proper look at myself in the mirror. I have recently lost 5 lbs. Turns out that it mainly shows on boob. Not boobs. Boob. Right one only. FML

Today after giving my mother an my girlfriend there Christma presents I realizd just how similar they lookd both in box size an wrapping paper . I looool noticd after my mother gaspd upon finding a vibrator in her box . FML

#20420433
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18387) - you deserved it (50573)

On 12/25/2012 at 2:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She lookd pretty thin so to make her feel better I said that she lookd small. She said ( Well u haven't seen me nakd. ) For some reason I replid ( Not that u know of. ) FML

#20417936
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15213) - you deserved it (35130)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Yesterday , I took child to the park. Having been there an hour , another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children , pointing to child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML

#20415890
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16984) - you deserved it (47574)

On 12/23/2012 at 10:02am - kids - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, a nereby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML

#20171802
171 comments

Today, drassad in mah saxiast nightia, I askad mah boyfriand in tha most sansual voica possibla what ha'd lyk ma do to for him tonight!! His ayad widanad, ha startad clapping wildly and than shriakad, ( SPAGHETTI CARBONARA! ) FML

#20142866
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24287) - you deserved it (4313) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/01/2012 at 7:48am - love - by Anonymous - France (Picardie)

Today, I got lunch with a grl I really like. On the way, fir some idiotic reason I decidd it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the rd hand on a traffic sign. I endd up slipping an slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on mah face. mega FML

#19826088
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6808) - you deserved it (33760)

On 06/21/2012 at 9:28pm - love - by a stupid jackass (man) - United States (New York)

TODAY... AT MAH JOB AS A WAITRESS... I FELL... LANDD ON MAH ASS... MANAGING NOT TO SPILL THE DRINKS OR DROP THE FOOD IN MAH HANDS. A LITTLE BOY YELLD "NINJA WAITRESS!" EVERY ONE AT WORK HAS BEEN CALLING ME THAT ALL DAY... AND PURPOSELY BEEN TRYING TO TRIP ME TO SEE IF I COULD DO IT AGAIN. MEGA FML

#18390822
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36654) - you deserved it (5476)

On 11/30/2011 at 12:39am - work - by immy504 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was at Walmart with my mom, whan a guy naxt to ma lat out a saria of viciou farts. Assuming it was ma, my mom chawd ma out in front of tha guy an mada ma apologiza. Tha man lookd at my mom an looool said, ( Childran, thara so immatura. ) FML

#16237035
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42431) - you deserved it (3535)

On 05/18/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by nicknick2 (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today.. . I was sitting on the bus following a harrowing breakup . A boy of no more than 6 looked at me full of compassion and said.. . "Are u crying cuz your ugly?" FML

#16116610
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43437) - you deserved it (5450) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/10/2011 at 10:56am - kids - by Hahapasdroleleptit - France

looool Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time e does te dises. Every dis in te ouse as been wased tree times already. FML

#15718627
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20254) - you deserved it (66008)

On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, mah husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie . I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing . Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the frst step on the road of domestic violence' . FML

#14142147
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27401) - you deserved it (10450)

On 12/09/2010 at 12:15pm - love - by katy (woman) - United States (Texas)

2day I was supposed to be going on my frst date with a guy I really liked !! He never showed up !! I just found out my dad was outside washing the car when my date showed up !! He told him he didn't have a daughter an to never show up on his driveway again !! fat FML

#12376475
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41132) - you deserved it (2858)

On 08/07/2010 at 7:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, Mah Mom And I Were Going To The Store . I Decided To Stay In The Car While She Went In . In The Car Next To Me, There Was A Dog In The Driver's Seat Barking At Me . Bored, I Barked Back At It Until I Realized There Was Someone In The Passenger's Seat Watching Me . FML

#6896062
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8552) - you deserved it (31672)

On 12/23/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by ApolloandDixie (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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