Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

comedybreak

Search for a member

comedybreak
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1645
  • Number of comments : 97
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 43 posted

About comedybreak : I've been on FML for 4+ years now, and comment very rarely.

comedybreak's last visitors

imyyinsomniacdreamerMetalManiacHappyVersthawkeyepeirceIwtumnUndecided_Jesusalexmac222therosalinawopchop12

comedybreak's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of comedybreak's badges

comedybreak's favorite FMLs

Today, while relaxing in a chair in a shop, a man approached me and said, "You have no idea how many times I've farted in that chair." FML

#20797188
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38285) - you deserved it (3962)

On 07/22/2013 at 7:49am - misc - by xXxXxTOBIxX (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend of six days proposed to me. FML

#20708141
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76815) - you deserved it (10291)

On 06/05/2013 at 7:11pm - love - by The Clitshank Redemption (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my brother looked me dead in the eyes and said his life goal is to find a way to jizz on everyone in the world. I'm scared. FML

#20703677
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51830) - you deserved it (4650)

On 06/03/2013 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Poland (Kujawsko-Pomorskie)

Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML

#20649343
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47659) - you deserved it (10614)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML

#20645479
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83914) - you deserved it (5188)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland (Donegal)

Today, it's my 17th birthday. The only person who remembered was the creepy guy in my English class who keeps trying to smell my hair. FML

#20624972
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49154) - you deserved it (3753)

On 04/27/2013 at 11:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML

#20602422
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41042) - you deserved it (4979)

On 04/18/2013 at 3:30pm - misc - by phonesmuggler (man) - United States

Today, I left my son with my husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, my dog was missing a large patch of fur, and neither of them can stop laughing. FML

#20599149
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37526) - you deserved it (7328)

On 04/17/2013 at 11:14am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after paying for my groceries, I noticed that a bread-roll hadn't been charged. I felt guilty and went back to the register to pay for it. The cashier burst into derisive laughter and mockingly asked me if I was "running for Pope or something". FML

Today, I was discussing possible career choices with my relatives. Pretty much everyone expressed the belief that I'm screwed for life, with my grandma commenting later: "She ain't even got the tits for porn. God help her." FML

#20577745
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40603) - you deserved it (3771)

On 04/06/2013 at 3:41pm - work - by flea-bitten (woman) - United States

Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML

#20564455
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38391) - you deserved it (16525)

On 03/28/2013 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was freshening up my makeup in the car before a date. An old lady walked by and said through my open window, "Don't bother. There's no helping you, honey." FML

#20559530
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36803) - you deserved it (3951)

On 03/25/2013 at 2:36pm - love - by f-ugly - United States

Today, I finally came out to my family as a lesbian. My grandma then told me I'm just going through a phase because I finally realized I'm not pretty or skinny enough to get a man. FML

#20557644
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35314) - you deserved it (6006)

On 03/24/2013 at 6:20am - misc - by theawesome129 - Canada

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of seven years. He stared at me, then said "Yeah, okay then. I'm gonna watch TV now." He then turned on the TV and watched Top Gun. Not quite the response I was hoping for. FML

#20556604
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18657) - you deserved it (35071)

On 03/23/2013 at 3:00pm - love - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my grandson visited me, and asked if I had any pictures of myself from when I was a little girl. I happily looked for a few photos to give him, asking what had piqued his curiosity. He replied that he wanted some for a presentation he's doing on the Middle Ages. FML

#20555821
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30372) - you deserved it (2548) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/22/2013 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Lorraine)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: