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cobrasparks

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cobrasparks

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 May 1987 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4136
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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cobrasparks's page activity

Visits<b>DanielT1994</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 5:01pm<b>SixthSinEnvy</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 12:47pm

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cobrasparks's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML

#21462545
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27244) - you deserved it (2093)

On 08/30/2015 at 11:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had to explain to my dad how I rear-ended the car in front of me because of a particularly intense banjo solo. FML

#21461958
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11666) - you deserved it (16945)

On 08/29/2015 at 1:09am - misc - by mumfordandsonimdisappointed - United States

Today, I had my daughter babysit her 2-year-old brother while I went out with my husband. I told her not to let him out of her sight. She certainly did as I said; when I tuned into our internet-enabled baby monitor, I heard her and some guy having sex in the room. FML

#21460833
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22907) - you deserved it (2350)

On 08/26/2015 at 4:04am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a fifth grader gave me a note from his "father" excusing him from PE. It was riddled with spelling errors and shockingly poor grammar, so I rejected it as a blatant fake. Several hours later, I was informed by his very angry father that it wasn't actually fake. FML

#21460557
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25010) - you deserved it (3301)

On 08/25/2015 at 3:22pm - kids - by shit.jpg (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

Today, I was at my summer babysitting job. The family's dog puked on the carpet and I proceeded to clean it up with baking soda and a mix of water/vinegar. Instead of blending in with the other areas of the carpet, the one spot I cleaned is white while the other areas are still darkened by filth. FML

#21460085
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20919) - you deserved it (2088)

On 08/24/2015 at 1:32pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband and I locked our keys in the car. Our only spare is in the drawer with all our sex toys. So we either had to get our oldest go in the drawer and get them to bring to us or walk the 12 miles home. My feet will never recover from that walk. FML

#21459919
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15741) - you deserved it (21419)

On 08/24/2015 at 12:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when I saw my best friend. I jokingly did a double-take and said I didn't recognize him with his clothes on. We laughed, talked a bit, then went our separate ways. My girlfriend later dumped me, claiming I'm blatantly gay and cheating on her. FML

#21459115
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24509) - you deserved it (3507)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:59pm - love - by cuckoo (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my current boyfriend was so impressed by my blowjob abilities he sent my ex-boyfriend a message saying thanks. FML

#21454601
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26268) - you deserved it (5135)

On 08/11/2015 at 12:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I was involved in a debate. Things got out of control, insults were hurled, and by the end friends were lost. The subject of the debate? Whether snot has enough calories in it to be nutritional. FML

#21454286
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19680) - you deserved it (5416)

On 08/10/2015 at 1:04pm - misc - by imma ture (man) -

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend, when I noticed a large piece of broccoli wedged between her teeth. I have no idea how she didn't feel it, but I couldn't stop fixating on it and started going soft. I had to cry out, fake an orgasm, then toss the condom really quickly to spare her feelings. FML

#21453082
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21926) - you deserved it (5296)

On 08/07/2015 at 8:51am - intimacy - by horsefuck (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I got fired from my part-time job, because I insisted on keeping my phone in my pocket and never using it, instead of putting it in locker without a lock or security camera, that anyone can go through. The manager found out by searching my locker for the past 3 weeks. Ironic. FML

#21452906
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25466) - you deserved it (2032)

On 08/06/2015 at 8:29pm - work - by Chesty Larue - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to claim it was my fault that he cheated on me, all because I "deprived" him of sex for two weeks last month when I went on a family vacation. If his mental gymnastics were physical, I swear he'd be able to suck his own cock. FML

#21452247
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25456) - you deserved it (2252)

On 08/05/2015 at 1:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

Today, driving to work, I stop to let an old man cross the street. The driver behind me honks their horn, so I decide to drive slow to piss them off. A few turns later, I pull into the car park and notice the other driver following me. She works in the office next to mine. We met the other day. FML

#21450445
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21301) - you deserved it (6238)

On 08/01/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Hellasboy (man) - Australia (Queensland)



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