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cmayer

Offline (the 08/13/2014 at 8:39am) | Search for a member

cmayer

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3072
  • Number of comments : 184
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About cmayer : .

cmayer's page activity

Visits<b>garage</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:23pm<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 7:04pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 3:08pm<b>gunzerker</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 3:03am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:16pm<b>noxiffic</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 5:39pm<b>Phaeno</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 2:42am<b>yodaman9910</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:09pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 12:16am<b>knotcool</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 8:19am<b>Valdrek</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:57pm<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 6:57am<b>pitapizzaparty</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 10:50pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 11:14pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 5:23pm<b>Ninjawalker115</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 10:53pm<b>InDoctorWeTrust</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 8:53am<b>Mahak1099</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 1:29pm

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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cmayer's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from a weekend trip with some friends, and walked straight in on my girlfriend cheating on me. She burst into tears and began apologizing. Her exact words were "I'm so sorry! I thought you were coming back tomorrow." FML

#18326234
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43197) - you deserved it (2628)

On 11/23/2011 at 12:03pm - love - by cheated - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML

#17874852
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29746) - you deserved it (2933)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm - kids - by jesus christ - United States

Today, I was so lonely, I tried to hold hands with plastic "horror hand" I bought for Halloween. FML

#17734152
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22882) - you deserved it (8192)

On 09/13/2011 at 2:11am - love - by Penkkis (woman) - Finland (Lapland)

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

#17508595
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37831) - you deserved it (3013)

On 08/18/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML

#17344218
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32049) - you deserved it (2902)

On 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by scully11 (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I was in a cinema watching a movie to review in the local paper. Suddenly, the guy behind me leans in and starts whispering and hissing "Do it... Do... It. DO IT" for the rest of the movie. I'm still not sure what he wanted me to do, but he did smell of vomit and had a tea-cosy on his head. FML

#17338822
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22040) - you deserved it (2306)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:43am - work - by Username - Australia

Today, my back hurt really badly, so I decided to stay in bed. After a while, I sat up to shut the door. When I leaned over to reach it, I fell off my bed and face-planted the floor. After picking myself up and getting comfortable in my bed again, I realized the door was still open. FML

#16746621
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26402) - you deserved it (9864)

On 06/19/2011 at 2:46pm - health - by no one - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML

#16676929
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42740) - you deserved it (3281)

On 06/15/2011 at 12:42pm - health - by Braxam - United States

Today, I married a wonderful man. Even though both of us were no longer virgins, we decided to wait until marriage to sleep together. He just told me I was the worst he's ever had. FML

#15133415
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44595) - you deserved it (11786)

On 02/27/2011 at 12:18am - intimacy - by newlywed - United States (Utah)

Today, I fell over a wet floor sign warning you not to fall over. The irony hurt more than the fall. FML

#14849029
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21929) - you deserved it (8920)

On 02/05/2011 at 4:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I lost my virginity, I think. Does it still count if she left halfway through, laughing? FML

#14449491
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48607) - you deserved it (9821)

On 01/03/2011 at 6:40am - intimacy - by Username -

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

#14413679
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25518) - you deserved it (5738)

On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a customer tried to pay for a $1.55 cup of coffee with a gift card, but he came up a dollar short. He let another customer through while he fumbled in his pocket for money. I later noticed a dollar had disappeared from my tip jar. FML

#14095339
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24826) - you deserved it (3460)

On 12/05/2010 at 12:36pm - work - by barista (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I decided to put on my Halloween make-up to be sure that I could and that it would look nice. I was satisfied with my results, and went to wash it off. Everything came off fine, except for the eye liner and eye shadow. It's bright purple. I'm a man. Halloween isn't until Sunday. FML

#13615434
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12835) - you deserved it (27293)

On 10/27/2010 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my husband told me the reason he'd been meeting his high school sweetheart behind my back and lying about where he was was out of respect for me. He thinks I'm ungrateful for not appreciating the lengths he's gone to to hide this. FML

#13380093
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31398) - you deserved it (2783)

On 10/09/2010 at 4:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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