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cmayer

Offline (the 08/13/2014 at 8:39am) | Search for a member

cmayer

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4251
  • Number of comments : 184
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About cmayer : .

cmayer's page activity

Visits<b>shinklefly</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 6:26am<b>Dynosaur_dollie</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 9:39am<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 12:16am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 2:11pm<b>tardisseeker</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 11:18pm<b>kingbubbles</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 1:01pm<b>giant_beaner</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 2:44am<b>McDiabeeto</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 8:44pm<b>mschmuty</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 7:58am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 9:28pm<b>hannahruth</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 7:38am<b>Aadavis94</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 2:45pm<b>garage</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:23pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 3:08pm<b>gunzerker</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 3:03am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:16pm<b>noxiffic</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 5:39pm<b>Phaeno</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 2:42am

Fucked!<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 6:16am

cmayer's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of cmayer's badges

cmayer's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't share food after I tried taking a chip from him. I made popcorn that night, and when he tried to take some, I said, "I'm sorry, I don't share food" to get him back. His response? "I can tell." FML

#20558472
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35706) - you deserved it (9088)

On 03/24/2013 at 7:47pm - love - by fuckyoutoo (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to the airport after saying goodbye to my, for some reason, giggling boyfriend. I learnt why he was so cheerful when I opened my purse in front of the guards, only to find pink-furry handcuffs, and a huge dildo. They pretended not to know what it was. FML

#20556322
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51736) - you deserved it (6266)

On 03/23/2013 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, I asked my bosses for three weeks off in July to go on a much-needed vacation. Their response was to fire me on the spot. My bosses are my aunt and uncle. FML

#20489213
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30949) - you deserved it (3543)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML

#20400784
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20883) - you deserved it (4326)

On 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by oh gee, you don't say (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I ran into my sister, who nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML

#20179890
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31100) - you deserved it (3547)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML

#20162265
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7127) - you deserved it (26457)

On 11/13/2012 at 8:03pm - misc - by scaredinnyc - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend had a tantrum because I didn't like Black Sabbath as much as him. Apparently our entire relationship was based on him thinking I did. I've now been labeled "The Queen of Lies." FML

#20108628
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19494) - you deserved it (2808)

On 10/09/2012 at 1:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Tasmania)

Today, my fully grown, 90-pound German Shepherd sniffed and wagged his tail as a guy mugged me. FML

#20054806
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24603) - you deserved it (2145)

On 09/02/2012 at 10:07pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my mom got a new puppy and named her Olivia. Which would be fine, if that wasn't the name I had been planning to give my baby, who's due in 3 weeks. Thanks mom. FML

#19983667
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26387) - you deserved it (2115)

On 07/25/2012 at 3:46pm - kids - by madmomma - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited, so I asked her why. She replied, "what birthday party?" It was a surprise birthday party. FML

#19626736
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15389) - you deserved it (26521)

On 05/15/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after my boyfriend broke up with me, the only thing positive about my day was a pregnancy test. FML

#19608696
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37569) - you deserved it (6370)

On 05/11/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by rawr_fml001 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my parents decided on my punishment for failing an English test. No deodorant for a week. They think they're so hilarious, they told all their friends and now it's all over Facebook. FML

#19555770
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25399) - you deserved it (3716)

On 04/30/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by sockmonkey (woman) - United States (California)

Today, someone spray painted a black skull on the side of my house. We painted over it and installed lights to hopefully persuade intruders not to vandalize the property because it would be a bright area. The lights were stolen. FML

#19362794
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21428) - you deserved it (2358)

On 03/28/2012 at 9:52am - misc - by andromeda80 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML

#19276997
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20488) - you deserved it (3330)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:19am - money - by me - United States (Florida)

Today, I'm so broke that when I got out of the shower, I had to slowly dry myself off with a ShamWow sample I received in the mail. FML

#18871908
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28228) - you deserved it (4007)

On 01/21/2012 at 3:38pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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