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cmayer

Offline (the 08/13/2014 at 8:39am) | Search for a member

cmayer

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2671
  • Number of comments : 184
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About cmayer : .

cmayer's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:16pm<b>noxiffic</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 5:39pm<b>Phaeno</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 2:42am<b>yodaman9910</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:09pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 12:16am<b>knotcool</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 8:19am<b>Valdrek</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:57pm<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 6:57am<b>pitapizzaparty</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 10:50pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 11:14pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 5:23pm<b>Ninjawalker115</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 10:53pm<b>InDoctorWeTrust</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 8:53am<b>Mahak1099</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 1:29pm<b>Sludge3</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 9:50am<b>DoubleDie7</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 10:22pm<b>sofaqueen_</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 3:52pm<b>FootballGod911</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 1:48am

cmayer's FML badges

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of cmayer's badges

cmayer's favorite FMLs

Today, my aunt drove to my house and screamed at me for skateboarding in her driveway and denting her car. She then ransacked my room for said skateboard so she could break it in half. My aunt lives 4 hours away. I don't own a skateboard. FML

#20682410
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46969) - you deserved it (2413)

On 05/23/2013 at 7:25pm - misc - by Dalistair (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I heard my grandma sobbing in her room. After finally convincing her to tell me what was wrong, she confessed to watching a porn video last night. She thinks not being able to sleep afterwards is a sign that God is punishing her, and that she's damned our family to hell. FML

#20681811
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41040) - you deserved it (3009)

On 05/23/2013 at 1:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Buzau)

Today, a friend was put on suicide watch when her parents wouldn't pay $500 for a premium senior picture package. FML

Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML

#20647820
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46103) - you deserved it (4176)

On 05/07/2013 at 3:07pm - misc - by babs (woman) - United States

Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML

#20646330
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24194) - you deserved it (48493)

On 05/06/2013 at 8:45pm - misc - by clumsy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend forced me to do stretching exercises with him before and after sex as a "safety precaution". FML

#20645667
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51698) - you deserved it (8565)

On 05/06/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by stretchy - United States (Maryland)

Today, my manager called me in to tell me I got the promotion I've been hoping for. He then said that since I didn't look excited about it he might have to rethink it. I was too busy concentrating on holding in diarrhea. FML

#20645244
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53157) - you deserved it (4220)

On 05/06/2013 at 11:25am - work - by perfecttiming (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tried channeling Mr. Miyagi by catching a fly with my bare hands. It turned out to be a wasp. FML

#20643732
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20132) - you deserved it (45845)

On 05/05/2013 at 7:30pm - misc - by FML136969 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I tried to show my boyfriend's mom a picture of my prom dress on my phone. She scrolled to the right to find a picture of her son, naked. FML

#20642331
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42118) - you deserved it (73259)

On 05/05/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by beyondembarrassed - United States

Today, my neighbours' whiny emo of a daughter got dumped by her boyfriend. In her infinite wisdom, she's chosen to cope by playing on her recorder the worst rendition of "My Heart Will Go On" that I've ever heard. It's been going on all day. Now I know why he dumped this idiot. FML

#20641408
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50582) - you deserved it (8681)

On 05/04/2013 at 5:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, my boss fired me for acting "inappropriately" at work. I gave him a hug. He's my dad. FML

#20638777
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65033) - you deserved it (7903)

On 05/03/2013 at 11:00am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML

#20634708
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53157) - you deserved it (4124)

On 05/01/2013 at 11:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I spent hours playing my guitar and singing in the street, hoping to make some extra cash. About 3 hours in, I realized some punk had been walking around with a hat taking money as if he was with me. FML

#20633517
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44428) - you deserved it (5028)

On 04/30/2013 at 8:31pm - money - by honeynuggetviolin -

Today, my ten-year-old sister had to write out my job application because no one can read my terrible handwriting. FML

#20628506
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22169) - you deserved it (34878)

On 04/28/2013 at 7:40pm - work - by AbhorrentApplication (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML

#20618791
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59394) - you deserved it (4426)

On 04/24/2013 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by awkward O_o - United States (Minnesota)



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