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Today, it's been a few days since I decided to give this girl I like the silent treatment.I've been writing on/off with her for a few weeks, but decided to stop a bit, to seem mysterious. When I logged on Facebook today, her status was "..is so happy that annoying guy has stopped writing to me!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (11241) - you totally deserved it (37460)
On 06/27/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by jake (man) - Denmark (Frederiksborg)
Today, Michael Jackson died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70556) - you totally deserved it (43634)
On 06/25/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was informed from a fellow employee at a bar that he finally "hit" the boss' wife. I work for my parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46540) - you totally deserved it (1107)
On 06/24/2009 at 5:59am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, my insomnia started back up again. It was too late to get something to help me sleep so I was lying there wondering what I should do. I decided to listen to some ambient music. It helped a lot, but when I was about to fall asleep my parents decided to start doing 'it'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35119) - you totally deserved it (1134)
On 06/20/2009 at 1:28am - health - by sleepless (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went commando because its 98 degrees and sweaty boxers are a pain. While walking to class at UT I heard a girl laugh behind me, I turned and flashed a quick smile and kept walking. It turns out I had sweat through my khakis and she totally could see my crack. Texas weather sucks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10918) - you totally deserved it (27933)
On 06/17/2009 at 1:44pm - misc - by Longhorn2011 (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I thought I saw a woodchuck far out in my yard. I wanted to take a cool picture of it so I slowly crept closer and closer to it. I spent half an hour sneaking up on a log. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9258) - you totally deserved it (29813)
On 06/14/2009 at 11:37pm - misc - by thelarkscaw (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18681) - you totally deserved it (33099)
On 06/14/2009 at 8:46am - misc - by locksmack (man) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, in the bathroom during the ACTs, my hair got stuck in the electric hand dryer. I had to rip my hair out. For future reference, hair + hand dryer = dreadlocks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23835) - you totally deserved it (7443)
On 06/13/2009 at 6:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52899) - you totally deserved it (1551)
On 06/13/2009 at 11:13am - misc - by Toothy_Peg (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was helping my church clean up a park. I was given a sledgehammer and told to break up a concrete picnic table so we could haul it off. About half way through I swung the sledgehammer REALLY hard, completely missed the table, and hit myself in the shin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39112) - you totally deserved it (13415)
On 06/10/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by rubmytummy (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door "Are you jacking off in there or something?!" and him scream back at her "Shut up you F*ing cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63380) - you totally deserved it (37068)
On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I had a meeting at work with my board of directors for a potential promotion. When one of them told a joke, I politely let out an amused snort. Then, I noticed my director's white shirt and tie covered in red splatter. I nose bled all over the director of my company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36198) - you totally deserved it (2335)
On 06/08/2009 at 2:51pm - work - by Marie (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, after masturbating in the shower, I heard my phone go off outside the bathroom. After my mom saw me get my phone to check my messages she said "I think you're addicted to that", to which I said "but it feels so good and every guy does it." She was talking about how I text people a lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7616) - you totally deserved it (45926)
On 06/07/2009 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Jon (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got a computer. When I opened it, I found out that my dad had made himself the administrator. He made it so everything shut off after 11 o'clock, and made it so I couldn't download anything without his password. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44941) - you totally deserved it (3866)
On 06/06/2009 at 9:17am - misc - by graduate - United States (New Jersey)
Today, at work, my ipod was stolen from my desk when I was away. I work in a police station. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48341) - you totally deserved it (4392)
On 06/06/2009 at 7:18am - work - by foretwintie (man) - Canada (Quebec)
