cman85

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cman85

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 May 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3110
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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cman85's page activity

Visits<b>noahghosthand</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 12:10am<b>akkai</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 8:45pm<b>groundedgirl25</b> - the 12/06/2010 at 6:38pm<b>soccer4eva</b> - the 06/24/2009 at 6:08pm<b>hellomynameisril</b> - the 06/24/2009 at 10:54am<b>soccerchic64life</b> - the 06/21/2009 at 10:34pm<b>mortified92</b> - the 06/05/2009 at 10:53pm

cman85's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

cman85's favorite FMLs

Today, it's been a few days since I decided to give this girl I like the silent treatment.I've been writing on/off with her for a few weeks, but decided to stop a bit, to seem mysterious. When I logged on Facebook today, her status was "..is so happy that annoying guy has stopped writing to me!" FML

by jake / 06/27/2009 at 5:11pm / Denmark (Frederiksborg) / Love

Today, I was informed from a fellow employee at a bar that he finally "hit" the boss' wife. I work for my parents. FML

by Anonymous / 06/24/2009 at 5:59am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, my insomnia started back up again. It was too late to get something to help me sleep so I was lying there wondering what I should do. I decided to listen to some ambient music. It helped a lot, but when I was about to fall asleep my parents decided to start doing 'it'. FML

by sleepless / 06/20/2009 at 1:28am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I went commando because its 98 degrees and sweaty boxers are a pain. While walking to class at UT I heard a girl laugh behind me, I turned and flashed a quick smile and kept walking. It turns out I had sweat through my khakis and she totally could see my crack. Texas weather sucks. FML

by Longhorn2011 / 06/17/2009 at 1:44pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought I saw a woodchuck far out in my yard. I wanted to take a cool picture of it so I slowly crept closer and closer to it. I spent half an hour sneaking up on a log. FML

by thelarkscaw / 06/14/2009 at 11:37pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML

by locksmack / 06/14/2009 at 8:46am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, in the bathroom during the ACTs, my hair got stuck in the electric hand dryer. I had to rip my hair out. For future reference, hair + hand dryer = dreadlocks. FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2009 at 6:16pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML

by Toothy_Peg / 06/13/2009 at 11:13am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was helping my church clean up a park. I was given a sledgehammer and told to break up a concrete picnic table so we could haul it off. About half way through I swung the sledgehammer REALLY hard, completely missed the table, and hit myself in the shin. FML

by rubmytummy / 06/10/2009 at 5:12pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

by badmom / 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, I had a meeting at work with my board of directors for a potential promotion. When one of them told a joke, I politely let out an amused snort. Then, I noticed my director's white shirt and tie covered in red splatter. I nose bled all over the director of my company. FML

by Marie / 06/08/2009 at 2:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, after masturbating in the shower, I heard my phone go off outside the bathroom. After my mom saw me get my phone to check my messages she said "I think you're addicted to that", to which I said "but it feels so good and every guy does it." She was talking about how I text people a lot. FML

by Jon / 06/07/2009 at 2:47am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I got a computer. When I opened it, I found out that my dad had made himself the administrator. He made it so everything shut off after 11 o'clock, and made it so I couldn't download anything without his password. FML

by graduate / 06/06/2009 at 9:17am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML

by foretwintie / 06/06/2009 at 7:18am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, at work my arms were full. I needed to get the door open, so instead of pushing the swing door open with my shoulder, I kicked it open with my foot. Right into my manager's face. FML

by hellogoodbye / 06/05/2009 at 11:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work