This member hasn't filled in their description.
clm123455's FML badges
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
clm123455's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 02/18/2012 at 1:22am / United States / Transportation
by 97 / 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by nycol / 02/17/2012 at 9:13am / Australia / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my grandmother for a spin in my new car. Apparently, she had no idea that seat-warmers exist and that hers was turned on, because fifteen minutes into the ride she started shouting, "My ass is on fire!" causing me to swerve into a pole. FML
by BOOP / 02/17/2012 at 8:25am / United States (Montana) / Transportation
by thatoneperson / 02/17/2012 at 7:43am / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by Cheap N Happy / 02/17/2012 at 4:44am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 02/17/2012 at 3:01am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, while working as a receptionist at a health clinic a woman came to settle her account. Before she left, she held out her closed palm and asked if I could put something in the bin for her. I held out my hand and watched many bits of chewed fingernails land in my palm. FML
by Tay / 02/16/2012 at 8:29pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Work
by Username / 02/16/2012 at 6:30pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by Anonymous / 02/16/2012 at 4:13pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/16/2012 at 2:41pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by mypoolisstilldirty / 02/16/2012 at 11:26am / Australia / Miscellaneous
Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML
by parkertownparadise / 02/16/2012 at 2:43am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
by Anonymous / 02/16/2012 at 2:32am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML
by Anonymous / 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm / United States (Texas) / Work
- Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be… Today, the guy I have been seeing stopped me in the middle of sex and told me to finish him off by… Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to spank the ferret in bed and spray me while singing…