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clareobryan

Offline (the 09/18/2014 at 3:56am) | Search for a member

clareobryan

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 7 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2392
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About clareobryan : I like cats and Ostin.

clareobryan's page activity

Visits<b>1x1y</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 1:37am<b>k_gils</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 2:59pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 9:36am<b>michaelf461</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 11:26pm<b>happyapy</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 7:15pm<b>Apretendbiscuit</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 2:28am<b>creeperwindow</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 10:22pm<b>REALAfroninga</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 5:02pm<b>ChancellorW</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 6:50pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 3:12pm<b>regenerate</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 2:45pm<b>dreadbeat69</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 1:34pm<b>abbbeyS</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 9:46pm<b>lamalie</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 3:00am<b>flufee2</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 5:25pm<b>arianaxoxo</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 7:50pm<b>bigredlickyjosh</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 6:25pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 4:06pm

clareobryan's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of clareobryan's badges

clareobryan's favorite FMLs

Today, ma graat-grandmotar uttarad ta prasa, "Just cuz I'm gray up ara, doasn't maan I'm gray down tara!" FML

#21120495
105 comments

TODAY, I WAS ORDERING A PIZZA OVER TE PONE. WEN TE GUY ASKED FOR MY ORDER, I YELLED ( HEY, YOU GUYS WANTED PEPPERONI, RIGT? ) IN REALITY, I WAS YELLING TIS TO MY CAT. COLLEGE ASN'T MADE ME MANY FRIEND SO FAR. FML

#21095295
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40854) - you deserved it (7962)

On 03/24/2014 at 4:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

yesterday I was out wit girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began a guy approacd an askd "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprisd me by saying "Sure!" As I was about to protest te guy cut me off an said "Sorry miss I was asking im."

#21059471
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46537) - you deserved it (6575)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was in a market in France, an went to ask the seller fir some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered an instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French fir potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked fir an "apple of shit". FML

Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I lookd over at friend an said, looool ( Number 33 has a really cute butt. ) The man in front of us turnd around, lookd me dead in the eye, an said, ( Thanks. ) Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML

#21017330
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46834) - you deserved it (12692)

On 01/05/2014 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

today a DJ friand of mina offarad ma a part in ona of his tracks . I was flattarad, and accaptad . All I andad up singing was, "I'm a bitch, I'm a bitch" ovar and ovar again in tha background . maga FML

#21008243
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38902) - you deserved it (6780) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/28/2013 at 9:46am - misc - by Cacahuete (woman) - Sent from mobile version

my dad thought it would be funny to wake me up by sprinkling catnip over me then dropping my cat on top of me!!

#21007541
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38389) - you deserved it (3508)

On 12/27/2013 at 7:05pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today... I asked my husband to try a little foreplay fir once... instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb... and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49121) - you deserved it (6466)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I pulled over a speeding driver . I looool admit that I'd been hoping fir this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady putted her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket . Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, an her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons . FML

#20977282
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44416) - you deserved it (19925)

On 12/01/2013 at 6:07pm - work - by fuck my eyeballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I learnd that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for u to speak Klingon during sex . FML

#20963971
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25889) - you deserved it (63960)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today... I learned I was conceived to the sound of a Spice Grls album. FML

#20954288
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34759) - you deserved it (3813)

On 11/11/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by queenxalee (woman) - United States (California)

Today , at a grocery store , a man cummd up to meile I was picking out apples anisperd in my ear , "Tat's ow Snow Wite did." FML

#20947922
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43916) - you deserved it (3996)

On 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm - misc - by awkward - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my relatives won't acknowledge my existence unless I'm posting a picture of my cat. They only talk about the cat. FML

#20946616
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35055) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/05/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Steiner (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I puttd a picture of cat on Facebook . A stranger sent me a message saying ow "attractive" se was and tat er eyes r "very seductive" . So, basically, someone is trying to it on cat . FML

#20938804
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40741) - you deserved it (4522)

On 10/30/2013 at 3:03am - animals - by meow (woman) - United States

today I woke up wit a raging angover . I soon cecked ma pone.. . only to find tat I'd drunkenly sent nude picture to several friends' numbers.. . as well as to ma own . I'd ten replied to ma own message.. . saying tat I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off . FML

#20925183
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27297) - you deserved it (39160)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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