Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

cjack188

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

cjack188

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 August 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 597
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About cjack188 : I study town planning. I love the sims 3, Harry potter, desperate housewives (t.v series). I'm always open to meeting new ppl and hearing other ppls stories, that's why I love this site :)

cjack188's page activity

Visits<b>carpedenoctem</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 3:07pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 3:56pm<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 3:56am<b>girlrome</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 7:30am<b>cherrio27</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 3:00am<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 5:56pm<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 5:41pm<b>atl904</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 11:32pm<b>Immortal_Toaster</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 5:35pm<b>SammyKins18</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 6:18am<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 11:27am<b>pumboc</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 5:55pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 12:20pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 1:34pm<b>birdybirdchirp</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 8:25am<b>CaptMurdock</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 9:35am<b>LickitungJr</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 10:57pm<b>viviaaann</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 9:41pm

cjack188's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of cjack188's badges

cjack188's favorite FMLs

Today, I replied to a party invite. I thought I was only replying to the hostess, who's a close friend, so added a P. S. about a recent sex toy purchase I'd made and how rubbish it had been. I only realised after pressing "Send" that I'd selected "Reply All". FML

#21271313
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22750) - you deserved it (33288)

On 10/05/2014 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

#21270711
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39723) - you deserved it (8439)

On 10/04/2014 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by SadMother - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

#21206177
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40260) - you deserved it (6114)

On 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm - health - by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in a restaurant bathroom, when another girl walked in. I have anxiety issues, and couldn't leave my stall until the other person went first. She rushed into a stall and had violent diarrhea for a good 10 minutes. FML

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50619) - you deserved it (6626)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took a look at my 9-year-old daughter's diary, thinking it would be full of cute stuff. Instead, it was full of hateful rants against me and my husband, as well the boys at her school, who she called gay because none of them ever hit on her. It seems I've failed as a parent. FML

#21171186
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44367) - you deserved it (17933)

On 06/11/2014 at 5:38pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had just sat down in the lobby of my doctor's office when my phone alerted me that I had a friend request. I checked; it was from some girl from high school. I muttered to myself, "I don't want to be your friend." I then heard a gasp. She was sitting across from me. FML

Today, I was dismissed from my job at an unemployment agency. In order to receive financial support from the government I need to be cooperating with a job service provider. They paired me up with the same place I was just fired from. FML

#21101310
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38193) - you deserved it (3292)

On 03/31/2014 at 8:43pm - misc - by awks - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I told my mom that my boyfriend had broken up with me. She was more upset about it than I was. She actually almost cried. FML

#21076568
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37754) - you deserved it (3820)

On 03/03/2014 at 2:13am - love - by Chilly (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I was babysitting an 8-year-old boy. He was playing with play-doh and made a sculpture that resembled a penis. I tried to cover up and asked if it was an action figure. He looked at me like I was an idiot and said, "It's a DICK." FML

#21069587
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42817) - you deserved it (5436)

On 02/23/2014 at 5:27pm - kids - by hot sweet.... not (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I was at the mall with a couple of friends when we saw a couple of cute boys. I made eye contact with the cutest one. Flustered, I giggled, only to send a wad of snot flying out of my nose. FML

#21067978
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42282) - you deserved it (7470)

On 02/21/2014 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my neighbor had a word with me for being "loud in the bedroom" last night. I haven't had any action for two years now, but I was too happy that she thought I'd got lucky to tell her the truth. So what was I really doing last night? Trying to sing like Christina Aguilera. FML

#21063667
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36323) - you deserved it (6341)

On 02/17/2014 at 7:14pm - misc - by I must suck at singing (woman) - United States

Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML

#21025933
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31732) - you deserved it (39350)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:40pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dog played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

#20991879
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36817) - you deserved it (6335)

On 12/14/2013 at 12:05am - animals - by Crystal_Nicole - United States (Kansas)

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

#20988758
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41769) - you deserved it (6888)

On 12/11/2013 at 8:14am - misc - by pootie (woman) - United States (Florida)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: