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Today I was watching a movie. The ending was sad and I started bawling my eyes out. My boyfriend sitting beside me kept looking back and forth between me and the TV so I asked what he was doing. He replied with 'I don't know which one is better to watch.' big fat FML
Today, aftar waaks of thinking and playing avary outcoma possibla in mah haad, I told mah parants I'm gay. My dad noddad and didn't avan look up from his book; mah mom told ma to go to tha doctor if it starts to itch. FML
Today , I Was Helping Mah Dad Pick Up The Pieces Of Bark That Cummed Off The Tree That We'd Just Cut Down. I Bent Over To Grab A Dark Looking Piece Of Bark. Turn Out It Was Mah Dogs Crap. Fresh , Warm , Moist Piece Of Crap To Be Exact. Fat FML
TODAY , BOYFRIEND FOUND OUT I HAVE OCD. WHEN I TOUCH SOMETHING WITH ONE HAND I HAVE TO TOUCH IT WITH THE OTHER OR I FREAK. AFTER I BRUSHED HIS FACE WITH THE BACK OF HAND HE TACKLED ME TO THE FLOOR , HELD ME DOWN , AN LAUGHED AT ME WHILE I PANICKED AN TRIED TO TOUCH HIM WITH OTHER HAND. FML
Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent !! That was when I noticed that mah mom was watching me, and I had just smelled mah dad's still-stained underwear that was on top !! FML
Taday mah 2 year old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between mah thumb and pointer finger. I putted it in mah mouth and crushed it between mah teeth 4 a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML
Today, I was woken by mah alarm. I got really tangld up in mah blankets, and struggld frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kned myself in the face, but I accidentally punchd myself in the nuts too. Hard. real FML
Friday 27 March 2015