chux4w

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chux4w

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 April 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11198
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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chux4w's page activity

Visits<b>TheGoatTamer</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 6:43pm<b>Ramanella</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:36pm<b>madrid201</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 6:02pm<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 12:48pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:10pm<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 11:33pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 08/16/2009 at 12:12am<b>thebeefzoosher</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 4:30pm<b>kjm1001</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 9:43am<b>surfbumm</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 3:19pm<b>Agrajagged</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 2:14pm<b>hellomynameisril</b> - the 05/24/2009 at 1:32pm<b>ShiBitch</b> - the 05/24/2009 at 11:04am<b>iluvpink02</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 8:00pm

chux4w's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

chux4w's favorite FMLs

Today, I was looking over the schedule for errors and circled a group of mistakes before handing it to my manager. When she handed it back to me, she gave me a weird look and I immediately noticed that the group of numbers I had circled formed a giant penis shape on the paper. FML

by dumblond / 08/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Maine) / Work

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

by ohgod / 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Iowa) / Kids

Today, while working at Starbucks, a customer spilled her drink all over the counter. After I cleaned up her spill and remade the drink (for free), she exclaimed "Thanks! I should really tip you!" Then she turned around, walked directly past the tip jar, and left the store. FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2009 at 9:59pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

by esb / 08/13/2009 at 11:23am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I found my car had been robbed. The thieves stole my GPS, my iPod and my digital camera. While I was filing the police report, the officer recommended I take photos for insurance purposes. Then she remembered my camera had been stolen. She actually started laughing. FML

by CosmicJoke / 08/12/2009 at 10:20am / United States (Virginia) / Transportation

Today, whilst babysitting, I broke a glass. I explained to the kid that it was very important not to walk barefoot around where it had happened, because of the tiny bits of glass. He jumped back, scared, and while doing so tripped. I rushed to help him and ran through the broken glass. Barefoot. FML

by ohdang / 08/12/2009 at 2:20am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my mom about how my friend is going to China for a year instead of college. My mom suggested that I could do the same. When I told her that a trip to China is probably more expensive than my college tuition, my mom replied, "Not for a one way ticket". FML

by unwanted / 08/11/2009 at 4:31pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother sat me down to tell me that since coming home from college, I sounded like "a liberated woman". She was disappointed and disturbed by this and said that I should stop having strong opinions and ideals because it would make finding a husband for me difficult. FML

by liberatedwoman / 08/11/2009 at 10:57am / Oman (Masqat) / Miscellaneous

Today, a patient was late for a psychiatry appointment, after having missed his previous two. I am the medical student on the team that was supposed to do his assessment. I said, "You snooze, you lose." Everyone stopped and looked at me. Apparently, he missed them because he has narcolepsy. FML

by psychedout / 08/10/2009 at 6:48pm / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, a friend of mine was talking about how he'd spent over 30 hours on Call of Duty. I piped up and said "Oh yeah! Well I've spent well over 300 hours on Morrowind! Beat that!" To which he replied, "I've had sex. Beat that!" I couldn't. FML

by Morrowindwhore / 08/10/2009 at 6:22pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Intimacy

Today, at my wedding reception, my father began his speech with "Well, I never, ever thought that this day would come," at which point the entire room, including my new husband, broke into a round of enthusiastic applause. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

by piratequeen / 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. Halfway through he asked me what day it was. I told him, "Friday." He jumped up and ran over to the TV yelling, "Oh my God! Shark week is almost over!!" I was cock-blocked by the Discovery Channel. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2009 at 11:16am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting it on with a girl I've been talking to for three months. She's a year younger than me and it was her first time. So, I went easy. After five minutes she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said I remind her of her dad. FML

by Jeremy / 08/06/2009 at 10:03pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was playing songs at a funeral in my church. As the organ wasn't in tune I had to use an electronic piano instead. All was going well until in the end of a speech, I accidentally hit the 'demo' button. None of the grieving relatives were impressed by my drum beats and turntable scratches. FML

by Jacky-Boy / 08/06/2009 at 8:22pm / United Kingdom (Liverpool) / Work