About christyxbee : Engaged. Likes cats. Hates spiders. Loves butterflies. Misses her brother dearly in heaven.
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christyxbee's favorite FMLs
Today, as I was putting on sports shoes to get to a job interview in a hurry, a man ran past me and grabbed my formal shoes while shouting, "Ninja!" Try explaining to the guy at the interview why I was wearing sneakers with a skirt suit. FML
by Baskets-Tailleur / 07/07/2014 at 2:58am / France / Love
Today, I was taking a shower when the soap began to burn my eyes worse than they've ever burned before. I quickly grabbed whatever cloth I could find to rub my eyes with. My dad's old underwear was the last thing I would expect to find lying near the tub. FML
by x.x / 07/06/2014 at 1:09am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/05/2014 at 1:53pm / United States / Work
Today, I parked my motorcycle in a parking spot. When I came back, my bike had been moved and was laying on its side with a note saying, "Sorry I dropped your motorcycle I was trying to move it forward so I could park my car because there weren't any other spots." FML
by AJL / 07/03/2014 at 9:30pm / United States / Transportation
Today, I found a wasp in my kitchen, so I opened the back door and left the room for 10 minutes in the hope that it would fly away. Upon returning, I found that there were now three wasps, a vicious cat and a very panicked pigeon crashing around the room. FML
by Snow-White / 07/03/2014 at 8:27pm / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Animals
by boob sisters / 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
by NosChersVoisins / 07/01/2014 at 12:55am / France (Aquitaine) / Love
Today, I had to explain what "cashback" was to a customer. She called me a liar and wanted to talk to a manager because she felt I made up the concept. I'm the manager. She wouldn't believe me and waited in the store for an hour. Apparently this is what a Masters degree gets me. FML
by where do they come from / 07/01/2014 at 12:26am / United States (Washington) / Work
by Anonymous / 06/28/2014 at 8:09pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals
Today, my soon to be mother-in-law sent out the invitations she made for my wedding. On them, it says "You are invited to this 'special' event". In the same way, I'm referred to as "special", and my name is misspelled. Hint taken, you bitch. FML
by Anonymous / 06/28/2014 at 4:40pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by anon / 06/21/2014 at 8:50am / United States (New Jersey) / Health
by stopinthenameoflove / 06/19/2014 at 10:37am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/19/2014 at 10:33am / United States (California) / Love
by sunil / 06/13/2014 at 6:53pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
Today, my dad called me into the bathroom, saying "Get a load of this shit, son" and forcing me to look at the biggest, foulest-smelling turd I have ever seen in my life in the toilet. It's been three hours and I still feel physically ill. FML
by green and not with envy / 06/13/2014 at 4:17pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
- 1Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…
- Today, after choosing all classes that start after 11, so I could finally sleep in 'til 9 everyday,… Today, I woke up to my head being covered by a pissy diaper, a pile of pee not even an inch from my… Today my boss asked us to cut stickers when we weren't busy. I work in a call center at night and…