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chrissymari

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chrissymari

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 914
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About chrissymari : All things bright and beautiful.

chrissymari's page activity

Visits<b>pferg33</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 2:34pm<b>icyhottt</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 2:45pm<b>virgilcole505</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 1:57am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 3:30am<b>ohdannyboyy</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 7:34pm<b>BridgieLou19</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 7:17pm<b>Sweet_Meli</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 5:20pm<b>150493x</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 4:21pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:26am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 12:52pm<b>lspartz</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 10:48pm<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 9:32pm<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 8:15pm<b>CersaBaby843</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 11:14pm<b>Kitty19</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 7:33pm<b>aLiYaaH</b> - the 08/27/2013 at 4:44pm<b>dlowry004</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 5:37pm<b>MickiJ</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 2:32pm

chrissymari's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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chrissymari's favorite FMLs

Today, a drunk driver drove his car through my mailbox. He got pissed, started yelling, and threatened to sue me for "putting the mailbox in the middle of the road". If my front lawn is a road, I'm going to have some serious issues. FML

#20754226
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40559) - you deserved it (2396)

On 06/29/2013 at 12:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

#20745866
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49455) - you deserved it (8742)

On 06/25/2013 at 2:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boss held my hair while I threw up. It's day two on the job. FML

#20738351
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45647) - you deserved it (8366)

On 06/21/2013 at 12:44am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML

#20732635
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57387) - you deserved it (4100)

On 06/18/2013 at 1:01am - kids - by imarriedanaxemurderer (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML

#20731669
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49253) - you deserved it (6458)

On 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

#20731352
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69036) - you deserved it (3960)

On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73040) - you deserved it (7223)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a bug buzzed into my ear. In response, I punched myself in the face. FML

Today, I ran out of clean boxers. Thinking nobody would find out, I snatched a pair of my wife's panties. Later, we had a cook out for my birthday, where some of my old pals thought it would be funny to pants me. FML

#20721670
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37573) - you deserved it (68232)

On 06/12/2013 at 2:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend was extremely nervous to meet my parents but I made him do it anyway. One of the first things out of his mouth was, "I'm glad you had sex." When they gave him a look of shock, he added, "You know, when you made your daughter! She's awesome!" FML

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

#20713183
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60998) - you deserved it (13821)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30818) - you deserved it (65616)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, my parents blew my entire college fund in their quest to finish building their replica Hobbit house in our back yard. FML

#20703566
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59063) - you deserved it (5780)

On 06/03/2013 at 3:22pm - money - by future burger flipper (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65705) - you deserved it (18728)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML

#20696605
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54706) - you deserved it (3114)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:20am - love - by wtf mom - United States (California)



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