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chrisbreastr0kr

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chrisbreastr0kr
  • Town/Country : California, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 23 December 1990 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 86
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About chrisbreastr0kr : I spend about 5 hours training in the pool a day, 7 days a week, so that's why the name is there, cuz I'm Chris and Im a breastroker. I have a wonderful girlfriend and I often go airsofting with my friends, hence the profile pic.

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chrisbreastr0kr's favorite FMLs

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

#20502122
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23783) - you deserved it (21632)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got married on Skyrim. To an elf. While in real life, my love life is floundering like a half-dead carp in the surf on a hot day. So much so in fact that I actually draw a measure of comfort from being married to an elf. FML

#20501864
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18550) - you deserved it (7050)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19am - love - by mr_loveless (man) - United States

Today, my furnace broke down, almost a month after its twenty year warranty expired. It would have been replaced for free. Now I'm going to have to take out a loan to afford the $4,000 replacement. FML

#20500397
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21964) - you deserved it (1950)

On 02/10/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by chillyinside - Canada

Today, after much coaxing, I finally got my roommate to loosen up and have a couple of beers with me and my friends. It was only later in the evening that he admitted the real reason he hadn't wanted to drink: he's an alcoholic and had been sober for six months, until now. FML

#20499970
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12091) - you deserved it (40775)

On 02/09/2013 at 6:26pm - misc - by mhmm... cumsquats (man) - Belgium (Brabant)

Today, my fiancé told me that it would be okay with him if I got plastic surgery to make my boobs larger. It would also be okay with him if I didn't get the surgery, but he would call off our engagement and never talk to me again. FML

#20499439
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41418) - you deserved it (5018)

On 02/09/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML

#20498986
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14173) - you deserved it (33431)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

#20497837
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45127) - you deserved it (6983)

On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML

#20497809
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29385) - you deserved it (7542)

On 02/08/2013 at 1:24am - love - by katelynm - United States

Today, I had to unpick a wedgie in the street. I backed against a wall, lifted my skirt and sorted it. I then turned around and caught eye contact with several men in the barbers behind me. Not such a solid wall after all. FML

#20496820
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9638) - you deserved it (24628)

On 02/07/2013 at 7:31am - misc - by chattyloz (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML

#20496769
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33800) - you deserved it (1506)

On 02/07/2013 at 4:51am - misc - by fviz (woman) - United States

Today, I told my sister that boys are stronger than girls. She responded by beating the living crap out of me to prove me wrong. She's twelve. I'm eighteen. FML

#20496678
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8780) - you deserved it (41052)

On 02/07/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by manhandled by a little girl (man) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my mother if I could have my boyfriend sleep over for Valentine's day weekend. Her response? "If you're on your period he can. Unless he's into that. Then no." FML

#20496085
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13316) - you deserved it (26091)

On 02/06/2013 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by dab1230 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a tenant in my apartment block told me about a nice shady place behind our building where he often goes to relax. Curious, I went looking for it. It was a quiet and secluded courtyard. At least until a man came out of nowhere waving a hammer in my face, screaming in a foreign language. FML

#20495981
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18008) - you deserved it (1785)

On 02/06/2013 at 6:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my kitten made it snow inside my house using a 12-pack of toilet paper. FML

#20495653
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18408) - you deserved it (3285)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I learned that my big, tough, strong dog is terrified of spiders when he jumped, knocked over a table and then peed on the spider to drown it. FML

#20495511
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23941) - you deserved it (3035)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:59am - animals - by DogLover (woman) - United States (New York)



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