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chrisbreastr0kr

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chrisbreastr0kr

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 22 December 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2303
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 39 posted

About chrisbreastr0kr : My name is because I am a swimmer and train 5 hours a day, not because I am a pervert. I enjoy airsofting with my friends, and I am a music major.

chrisbreastr0kr's page activity

Visits<b>imasexyburrito</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:21pm<b>FuentezFam</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 9:04pm<b>sailing_is_life</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 9:51pm<b>jks0308</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 4:24pm<b>iireenee</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:50pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 8:52am<b>Amber_Naomy</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 4:28pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:00am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:17pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:57pm<b>3051628</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 2:58pm<b>Cian_1</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 8:03pm<b>BlingBang</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 3:38pm

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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chrisbreastr0kr's favorite FMLs

Today, mah husband and I announced our upcoming divorce . My friends told me how sorry they were and that their available firhatever I need . His friends told him to just call the girl from last weekend and get himself laid again . FML

#20583666
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48814) - you deserved it (6500)

On 04/10/2013 at 3:09pm - love - by a - United States

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on mah arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, an I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on mah forearm. FML

#20579781
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15511) - you deserved it (59857)

On 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by maturity - Australia (New South Wales)

TODAY... I WAS WATCHING A MOVIE WITH MY PARENTS WHEN A SEX SCENE CUMMED ON. AS IF THAT WASN'T AWKWARD ENOUGH... THEY STARTED MAKING OUT ON THE COUCH BEHIND ME. FML

#20577290
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57240) - you deserved it (5186)

On 04/06/2013 at 10:15am - intimacy - by ohgodwhy - Canada (Ontario)

MY BEST FRIEND WAS THROWING ME MAH BACHELORETTE PARTLY . A COP CUMMED BY AND SAID THERE HAVE BEEN COMPLAINTS ABOUT THE NOISE . THINKING HE WAS THE STRIPPER WE ORDERED, WE PULLED HIM INTO THE HOUSE . HE WAS AN ACTUAL COP . MEGA FML

#20577218
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39889) - you deserved it (19487)

On 04/06/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by Evalynne - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was working at a daycare. There was a 6-year-old boy pretending to be mah doctor, holding a little, plastic thermometer. He then, without warning, quickly shovd it deep into mah ear. The last thing I heard was his giggle. I think I'm deaf. FML

#20575140
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39777) - you deserved it (3535)

On 04/04/2013 at 7:55pm - kids - by icanthearyou (woman) - United States (Illinois)

today mah boss threatened to fre me for killing him in Minecraft. real FML

#20571304
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35227) - you deserved it (7622)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:30am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally had the best sex I've ever had with this really hot guy I've been hanging out with lately. I thought everything was all well an good until he turned to me an said, "You know, yur orgasm face kinda reminds me of Steve Martin, but in a good way." big fat FML

#20570614
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46423) - you deserved it (7946)

On 04/01/2013 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by LadySteveMartin (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I Got A Letter From Yale Law School Saying I Got A 4 Year Full Scholarship!! I Called Mah Dad Crying And Read Thehole Thing..!! Even The Bottom,hich Said, "April Fools! Love Mom And Dad." FML

#20570035
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59340) - you deserved it (5981)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:46pm - misc - by madiison09 - United States

Today, mah boyfriend cummed over with a hickey on his neck !! He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse !! FML

#20569989
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37540) - you deserved it (3852)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:17pm - love - by tkrause - Canada (British Columbia)

TODAY , 4 MY BRTHDAY , THE ONLY "GIFT" MY PARENTS GAVE ME WAS THE GIFT OF CHOICE: I GOT TO CHOOSEHICH ONE OF THEM I'LL BE LIVING WITH AFTER THERE UPCOMING DIVORCE. THIS WAS THE FRST TIME I'D HERED ANYTHING ABOUT A DIVORCE. FML

#20569388
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34832) - you deserved it (1979)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:03am - misc - by HappyBirthdayISuppose (woman) - United States (Colorado)

TODAY, I CAME HOME IN TERES OVER FINDING OUT MY BOYFRIEND HAS BEEN CHEATING ON ME. I TOLD MY SEEMINGLY SYMPATHETIC DAD EVERYTHING. HIS ADVICE WAS TO LURE THEM BOTH TO OUR HOUSE WITH THE PROMISE OF A THREE-WAY, AFTERHICH HE'D "KILL THE SHIT" OUT OF THEM. REAL MATURE, DAD. FML

#20568440
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34575) - you deserved it (6326)

On 03/31/2013 at 1:55pm - love - by immaturity all around (woman) - United States

Today, I announced to my family that I got accepted into Harvard. My grandma laughed and muttered, "Liar." FML

#20567796
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38422) - you deserved it (2884)

On 03/31/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my German Seperd decided to bark at, ten attack, a painted rock!! At least I know I'm protected from inanimate objects!! mega FML

#20561241
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28144) - you deserved it (3156)

On 03/26/2013 at 5:17pm - animals - by whykarma (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, during a sex d lesson, we were given a lecture on pregnancy an abortion from the school nurse!! Throughout the session she kept repeating, ( Of course, Sophie knows ALL about this!! ) The nurse happens to know that mah dad's a gynaecologist!! That's not wat everyone else in the year thinks!! fat FML

#20559804
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41774) - you deserved it (2477)

On 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Soph (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I broke up with mah boyfriend of seven yeres . He stared at me, then said "Yeah, okay then . I'm gonna watch TV now." He then turned on the TV and watched Top Gun . Not quite the response I was hoping for . FML

#20556604
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20026) - you deserved it (37402)

On 03/23/2013 at 3:00pm - love - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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