chippa

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chippa

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 December 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13442
  • Number of comments : 525
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About chippa : Life is good.
Go with the flow.
Know your place.

I like to whistle, read, learn, pet cats, and memorize things, such as song lyrics, lines of movies or plays, and digits of pi.

I am taller than you.

The thing I would like to do most in life is travel in outer space.

chippa's page activity

Visits<b>Moonditch</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 8:09am<b>SocialAmethyst</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 10:39am<b>Scootythedog</b> - the 08/19/2016 at 4:55pm<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 7:54pm<b>arenn</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 5:16am<b>gorgonkiller15</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 11:12am<b>puppies1234</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 11:41am<b>loueasy</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 12:50pm<b>28actress</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 4:17am<b>BonerFart</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 8:53pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 8:29am<b>KingSquisher</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 4:52pm<b>bheaze</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 5:14am<b>ArgentumAurum</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 5:49pm<b>soapysurprise</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 11:22am<b>UPTDraco</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 3:40pm<b>roman11</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 11:21am<b>HeatherFeatherB</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 12:19am

Fucked!<b>5t3ff1k4h</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 1:55am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 5:26am<b>sarahsatragno</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 10:20am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 8:06pm<b>Codezlol</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 6:47pm<b>z3r0d4z3</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 8:50am<b>trey600rr</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 1:49am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 2:05pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:08am

chippa's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of chippa's badges

chippa's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2011 at 7:35pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my mother insisted I thoroughly water all the plants in and around my house before some people turned up. This would be fine except 90% of them are fake. She is convinced it will make them look "realer." FML

by omfgfmlife / 07/05/2011 at 10:32am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally went to the bathroom after being constipated for two days. The good news? I lost two pounds. The bad news? The toilet won't flush. FML

by Me / 06/20/2011 at 12:14pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML

by NewTenant / 06/20/2011 at 3:37am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I made the long drive to work, got out of the car, and realised that I'd forgotten to put shoes on before I left the house. FML

by Hannah / 06/17/2011 at 5:24pm / Ireland (Sligo) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was yelled at by my mum for not wanting to get a spray tan for my cousin's wedding because if I don't, I will "shine like a beacon of disrespect" among the other attendees. FML

by vampire / 06/16/2011 at 4:53pm / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

by anonymous / 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, my son's homework was to write a story about what he wants to be when he grows up. He wrote that he plans on being unemployed and living at home until we throw him out, then he'll live under a bridge. He's only 12, but already planning for a future as an unemployed bum. FML

by Seriously / 06/15/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

by notinthebutt / 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Money

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

by techiefIve / 06/14/2011 at 6:04am / United States (California) / Geek

Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML

by julia / 06/11/2011 at 7:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, my five year old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML

by julia / 06/11/2011 at 7:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I was at the park with my daughter. She walked up to a boy at the swings, held her hand out, and said, "Hi I'm Vanessa, and someday you'll be working for me." FML

by Rachel / 06/10/2011 at 5:57am / United States (Alabama) / Kids

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by a "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. And we continued to chat. FML

by IPityTheStool / 06/09/2011 at 9:22am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, I was complimented on my hat by two different people. I wasn't wearing a hat. FML

by AndieApocalypse / 06/03/2011 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous