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chippa

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chippa
  • Town/Country : Vancouver, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 December 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 9319
  • Number of comments : 525
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About chippa : Life is good.
Go with the flow.
Know your place.

I like to whistle, read, learn, pet cats, and memorize things, such as song lyrics, lines of movies or plays, and digits of pi.

I am taller than you.

The thing I would like to do most in life is travel in outer space.

chippa's last visitors

Monster27suckstosuckgirlAlexaWuzHereNarttualexissblakeeStardew

chippa's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of chippa's badges

chippa's favorite FMLs

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

#20451560
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28698) - you deserved it (8469)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

#20161582
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21962) - you deserved it (3360)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML

#20120541
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19500) - you deserved it (4650)

On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States

Today, I had to pick my parents up from the hospital and drive them back home, after they were treated for eating large amounts of cheese that my dad claimed to have "aged" for several years. FML

#20116789
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12971) - you deserved it (848)

On 10/14/2012 at 4:36pm - health - by oppafucktardstyle (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML

#20042325
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19354) - you deserved it (1683)

On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML

#20037909
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32219) - you deserved it (9798) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version

Today, at the water park, my grandmother's boob slipped out. Every time I close my eyes, I see her dangling breast in my mind. FML

#20029280
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26338) - you deserved it (2302)

On 08/19/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by JMG - United States

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

#20025968
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21170) - you deserved it (2380)

On 08/17/2012 at 3:45am - misc - by Sarah - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML

#20019911
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22435) - you deserved it (3718)

On 08/14/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I discovered that the only reason my husband is taking yoga classes with me is because he wants to be flexible enough to suck his own rod. FML

#19996058
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27123) - you deserved it (4438)

On 08/01/2012 at 5:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as I sat down for my flight, I realised that the passenger I had to sit next to for the next seven hours was wearing a necklace made from tampon packaging. FML

#19995117
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19520) - you deserved it (1539)

On 07/31/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by lotd - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I received a "get well soon" card in the mail, which I found just a little odd, since I was feeling completely fine. Not an hour later, I tripped and fell down a flight of stairs. FML

#19981576
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23177) - you deserved it (1915)

On 07/24/2012 at 1:36pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I discovered my cat's favorite hobby: sitting butthole-first on my favorite makeup brush. FML

#19870178
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17646) - you deserved it (2145)

On 06/30/2012 at 4:10am - misc - by audreyav - United States (Oregon)

Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML

#19531313
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21932) - you deserved it (1490)

On 04/26/2012 at 7:49am - misc - by Diffy - United States (Massachusetts)



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