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Today, I was eating lunch at McDonald's when an older man sat down at the table next to me and told me I was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. I'm a 20 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24506) - you deserved it (4170)
On 11/04/2010 at 3:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I found out that the guy I like was only coming to my house to get closer to my brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28232) - you deserved it (3090)
On 08/13/2010 at 1:33am - love - by brother love - United Kingdom
Today, I couldn't fall asleep till 3am and was woken approximately every hour or so. Why? I found out my new upstairs neighbors have a very active love life. She's a screamer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26447) - you deserved it (2087)
On 08/09/2010 at 2:18am - intimacy - by SleeplessInSoCal (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32950) - you deserved it (9650)
On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)
Today, I found out my sister has a new boyfriend. That would have been helpful to know 3 hours ago before I told her boyfriend, who is also my best friend, that I loved him. His response? "HAHAHA! Good one! Oh Seriously? Shit." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23943) - you deserved it (2143)
On 03/02/2010 at 1:07am - love - by SingleSara. (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was sitting down in a store when a stroller stopped by me. While the parents were fixing the strap, the baby looked at me, gasped, looked at me again, gasped, and then screamed. Ten minutes later, another baby looked at me and screamed. My face scares babies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23282) - you deserved it (2706)
On 02/20/2010 at 7:03pm - kids - by Scaryman (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I decided to change my boyfriend's background on his phone. As I was in the process of changing it, I noticed his most recent picture is of a naked girl. The naked girl happens to be my 18 year old sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36300) - you deserved it (3276)
On 02/05/2010 at 4:18pm - love - by whoknows?! - Sent from mobile version
Today, I found out that I'm not actually pregnant. I've apparently been having a hysterical pregnancy because I want a child so badly. I don't know which was worse, the look of relief on my husband's face or having to send a mass email to inform my family and friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21468) - you deserved it (6006)
On 02/03/2010 at 6:58am - misc - by sadface - Sent from mobile version
Today, I got a call from my local hospital's emergency room, stating my wife was in labour. My wife and I split years ago, but just haven't divorced. She is telling everyone I am the baby's father, my current girlfriend is 7 months pregnant with my child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15080) - you deserved it (6111)
On 12/21/2009 at 10:23am - intimacy - by johnG (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, someone at work was bragging that their son was high school valedictorian and offered a full college scholarship. 7 years ago, I was also valedictorian and got that same scholarship. All I said was, "Congratulations. Did you want fries with that?" and continued taking their order. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31378) - you deserved it (5121)
On 11/07/2009 at 11:04am - work - by John (man) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, there was a big cake at the office. I thought it was funny to pretend to push the cute girl in the office into it. She laughed, but then lost her balance and fell forward. Everyone saw. Turns out she’s allergic to coconut, even just the shavings on a cake, and had to go to the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8534) - you deserved it (28960)
On 09/29/2009 at 2:40pm - work - by cakekiller (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him by handing me a ring and telling me, "Okay we're engaged now." I should have seen it coming when we started dating, I went to his house one night and as I was leaving he said, "Okay you're my girlfriend now." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32672) - you deserved it (13741)
On 09/22/2009 at 12:27am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (51146) - you deserved it (11686)
On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (139716) - you deserved it (11032)
On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I decided to cook dinner for my wife and kid. After a long day of preperation and cooking I asked them what they thought of it. My 12 year old son then says, "I would say it tastes like shit but not even shit tastes this bad!" My wife then laughed and gave him a high-five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31918) - you deserved it (3897)
On 08/22/2009 at 2:29am - kids - by NoCookForYou (man) - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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