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chenchichan

Offline (the 12/24/2014 at 4:30am) | Search for a member

chenchichan

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 502
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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chenchichan's FML badges

50 favourites

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Consolation prize

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chenchichan's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to splurge and get valet parking at a fancy restaurant. I got out of the car and gave the man my keys and watched as he slowly backed my car into another car. FML

#21319039
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34281) - you deserved it (3386)

On 12/17/2014 at 8:33am - misc - by seriously - United States (Illinois)

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML

#21318752
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36859) - you deserved it (7269)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, my cat let out the biggest moan I have ever heard, while we were both in the living room. My dad heard and accused me of watching porn. FML

#21317874
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33904) - you deserved it (3006)

On 12/15/2014 at 11:07am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34591) - you deserved it (2862)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that he's not very good at dirty talk. He does it every time we have sex and it always turns me off. He started crying. FML

#21316697
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37265) - you deserved it (6819)

On 12/13/2014 at 10:20am - intimacy - by Nicole (woman) - United States

Today, I took out my old hairdryer and turned it on. I then gave my roommate a show as I ran out of the bathroom, naked and screaming, after a spider was blasted out of the hairdryer and directly at my face. FML

#21316166
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33604) - you deserved it (4293)

On 12/12/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by lateralligator - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML

#21315734
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21326) - you deserved it (27160)

On 12/11/2014 at 6:13pm - work - by IHateSchool-.- - United States

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

#21315591
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27576) - you deserved it (3226)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:10pm - kids - by MedStudent90 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He's Latino, so I thought he'd like it if I made a bit of noise and called him "papi" while we did it. It freaked him out enough to kill his boner, and now he thinks I have some kind of incest fetish. FML

#21310722
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21865) - you deserved it (42624)

On 12/03/2014 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48472) - you deserved it (13604)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to give my boyfriend a surprise striptease. After I turned around, I heard him murmur "Oh, wow." I turned back around, only to find him watching a gif of a cat falling into snow in slow motion. FML

#21291260
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35876) - you deserved it (4154)

On 11/03/2014 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Dezzy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

#21288518
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29972) - you deserved it (25149)

On 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

#21286701
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28124) - you deserved it (36919)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40576) - you deserved it (18365)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was taking a table's order. After I finished, the guy told me, "Just FYI, I'm not a tipper." Trying to lighten up the situation, I replied, "It's amazing how many people forget I handle their food." He complained to the manager that I'd threatened him. FML

#21268536
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39415) - you deserved it (7803)

On 09/30/2014 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)



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