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cheezewhizz

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cheezewhizz
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1637
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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cheezewhizz's favorite FMLs

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I have an extra key. I snuck into his bed with sleep with him and noticed how soft his skin was. Turns out I had been feeling up the girl he was sleeping with and he was in the bathroom. FML

#4580514
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55850) - you deserved it (6778)

On 08/16/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I have an extra key. I snuck into his bed with sleep with him and noticed how soft his skin was. Turns out I had been feeling up the girl he was sleeping with and he was in the bathroom. FML

#4580514
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55850) - you deserved it (6778)

On 08/16/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I grabbed the nearest plastic bag in my bedroom when my boyfriend and I left for Wal-Mart so I could return a pair of shorts. When the cashier dumped the contents of the bag onto the counter at customer service, my shorts and a used condom fell out. It was the longest return of my life. FML

#4574757
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11492) - you deserved it (49087)

On 08/16/2009 at 2:51pm - intimacy - by lolreturn (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML

#4572721
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55098) - you deserved it (9620)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I woke up with my girl laying next to me in bed. When she woke up we started to get hot and heavy but all of a sudden our cat hops on the bed. I guess the cat was more important cause my girl got up started playing it instead of me. Cockblocked by another pussy. FML

#4572543
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50210) - you deserved it (7501)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:04pm - intimacy - by Steve (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was driving on the freeway and there was a dead animal (I think a cat) in the road. The car in front of me decided to merge over. It kicked up part of the dead animal and sent it flying through my open window. I think I got hit in the face with a piece of foot. FML

#4571897
101 comments

Today, I was driving on the freeway and there was a dead animal (I think a cat) in the road. The car in front of me decided to merge over. It kicked up part of the dead animal and sent it flying through my open window. I think I got hit in the face with a piece of foot. FML

#4571897
101 comments

Today, I finished writing the most perfect love letter for this girl at summer school. At the end of the letter I signed: Your secret admirer. Cute, right? Not really. Turns out I was so anxious to finish the letter that I ended up writing my name at the bottom. FML

#4563913
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8657) - you deserved it (37782)

On 08/16/2009 at 1:17am - love - by footyfallout (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, at a family gathering, my aunt asked me when I was planning to have children. I'm only 16, I laughed and said not for a while, definitely not until I get married. My family shook their heads, and ignored me for the rest of the day. Apparently, teenage pregnancy is valued in my family. FML

#4555505
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53993) - you deserved it (2501)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus' new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML

#4555175
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42509) - you deserved it (20526)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by notguilty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, being a big believer in karma, I found it fitting that a girl that was always a bitch to me in high school is now fat and ugly. After sending one of her recent pictures with a mean caption to a few of my friends, I tripped and sprained my wrist falling up the stairs. Karma. FML

#4550264
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11352) - you deserved it (47341)

On 08/15/2009 at 2:51pm - misc - by whatgoesaround (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, while showering I slipped and fell, taking down the shower curtain and smashing my head against the floor, resulting in a concussion. My family came running because of the noise and I lay naked, bleeding and concussed for few minutes before they could stop laughing enough to get me help. FML

#4548386
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38252) - you deserved it (2446)

On 08/15/2009 at 12:58pm - misc - by iltdtsm - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I invited everyone to a gig I'm playing at a bar. They closed it down just for me when I told them how many people were attending, and I spent all day setting it up. Turns out nobody showed up besides my mom, my dad, and 2 of my cousins. I still had to play 7 songs in front of them. FML

#4546975
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40403) - you deserved it (5902)

On 08/15/2009 at 11:02am - misc - by playinmyguitar (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after having a few beers at a bar, I gave my ticket to the valet to get my car. I tipped the man $2 and he gave me a huge smile and thanked me a lot as I left. I thought the guy was just really appreciative for those $2 until I got home and saw one of the $100 bills in my wallet was gone. FML

#4546368
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10091) - you deserved it (48593)

On 08/15/2009 at 9:56am - money - by whooops (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after dating my girlfriend for about a month she decided to change her Facebook status to taken. When I saw the update I immediately clicked "Like." Then I looked up and saw I wasn't the person she had put herself in the relationship with. FML

#4533889
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43183) - you deserved it (4607)

On 08/14/2009 at 8:39pm - love - by waitthatsnotme (man) - United States (California)



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