chatoyant

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chatoyant

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3491
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About chatoyant : Instagram @linfaa

chatoyant's page activity

Visits<b>TheFeels</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 1:34am<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 6:44am<b>Zatert</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 10:35pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 12:24pm<b>droid1126</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 8:23am<b>emo_and_supreme</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 4:56pm<b>niceguy123</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 12:33pm<b>pitypisces</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 1:50pm<b>molloy2</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 6:09pm<b>james71993</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 9:42pm<b>LiveDreamsG</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 10:38am<b>ananicosia</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 8:51pm<b>l4urenz</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 12:58pm<b>NakuEh</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 11:23am<b>tomtom375</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 6:25am<b>hussamhasi</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 3:20pm<b>Celeden</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 11:42pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 12:32am

Fucked!<b>droid1126</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 2:23pm<b>tomtom375</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 12:26pm<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 6:32am<b>imerichello</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 1:22am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 12:01pm<b>Odannyboy</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 6:00am<b>thesadboy</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 11:03pm<b>NebulaNick</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 6:54pm

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chatoyant's favorite FMLs

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

by religionbites621 / 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation

Today, I went to my doctor. I casually asked him why I keep getting headaches after I masturbate. He said it probably was a sign from God. FML

by toomuch / 11/22/2011 at 4:36am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, my boss phoned me and asked me why I wasn't at work. I was in the staff room. I said hello to her as I came in the door. FML

by arthur / 11/19/2011 at 3:40am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Work

Today, we had a sprint race in gym class which I wasn't looking forward to because I'm a little chubby. The race started and I shot off as fast as I could, somehow in the lead. Everyone was cheering. When I was nearing the finish line I turned around, only to see the race hadn't started yet. FML

by dan / 11/18/2011 at 11:54pm / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML

by Chubby / 11/17/2011 at 11:50am / United States / Work

Today, I was reading a book in German, which I don't know very well. Suddenly I reached a passage I had no trouble understanding. Excited, I showed my husband, saying I was finally getting the hang of it. He laughed and patted my head. Turns out, that particular passage was a quote. In English. FML

by dunicha / 11/16/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my date threw a fit, burst into tears, and made a huge scene in the middle of a crowded restaurant, all because I offered to pay. FML

by Izamellayella / 11/14/2011 at 8:29pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2011 at 12:23am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I found pictures in my boyfriend's phone of our dog eating treats out of my mouth while I'm sleeping. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2011 at 12:09am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my daughter asked me how to spell "Orange". "O-R-A-N-G-E" I replied. Without missing a beat, she says "No, I mean the colour, not the fruit." She is 16. FML

by weswithaute / 11/13/2011 at 1:53am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML

by Nico / 11/12/2011 at 10:42am / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching wrestling videos on YouTube, when my little brother walked in. Later, my little brother told my parents that I was watching naked men on my computer. They won't stop thinking that I was watching gay porn. FML

by Anonymous / 11/12/2011 at 9:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to break up with my girlfriend because I feel unappreciated. She fell asleep while I was attempting this. FML

by kirrby / 11/12/2011 at 1:41am / United States (Nevada) / Love

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

by Anonymous / 11/12/2011 at 12:34am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML

by Anonymous / 11/10/2011 at 12:07pm / Ireland (Cork) / Animals