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chatoyant

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2421
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About chatoyant : Instagram @linfaa

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chatoyant's favorite FMLs

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32980) - you deserved it (3127)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to my doctor. I casually asked him why I keep getting headaches after I masturbate. He said it probably was a sign from God. FML

#18314611
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34823) - you deserved it (11620)

On 11/22/2011 at 4:36am - intimacy - by toomuch (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boss phoned me and asked me why I wasn't at work. I was in the staff room. I said hello to her as I came in the door. FML

#18286848
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28559) - you deserved it (2269)

On 11/19/2011 at 3:40am - work - by arthur (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, we had a sprint race in gym class which I wasn't looking forward to because I'm a little chubby. The race started and I shot off as fast as I could, somehow in the lead. Everyone was cheering. When I was nearing the finish line I turned around, only to see the race hadn't started yet. FML

#18285625
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35103) - you deserved it (8159)

On 11/18/2011 at 11:54pm - misc - by dan - Reserved

Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML

#18272205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32314) - you deserved it (4698)

On 11/17/2011 at 11:50am - work - by Chubby - United States

Today, I was reading a book in German, which I don't know very well. Suddenly I reached a passage I had no trouble understanding. Excited, I showed my husband, saying I was finally getting the hang of it. He laughed and patted my head. Turns out, that particular passage was a quote. In English. FML

#18266824
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9173) - you deserved it (33159)

On 11/16/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by dunicha - United States (Texas)

Today, my date threw a fit, burst into tears, and made a huge scene in the middle of a crowded restaurant, all because I offered to pay. FML

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

#18242988
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32858) - you deserved it (4286)

On 11/14/2011 at 12:23am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found pictures in my boyfriend's phone of our dog eating treats out of my mouth while I'm sleeping. FML

#18242868
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30925) - you deserved it (4171)

On 11/14/2011 at 12:09am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my daughter asked me how to spell "Orange". "O-R-A-N-G-E" I replied. Without missing a beat, she says "No, I mean the colour, not the fruit." She is 16. FML

#18234448
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41445) - you deserved it (7189)

On 11/13/2011 at 1:53am - kids - by weswithaute - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML

#18227248
465 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41074) - you deserved it (3183) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/12/2011 at 10:42am - misc - by Nico - France

Today, I was watching wrestling videos on YouTube, when my little brother walked in. Later, my little brother told my parents that I was watching naked men on my computer. They won't stop thinking that I was watching gay porn. FML

#18226728
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29603) - you deserved it (6791)

On 11/12/2011 at 9:19am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I tried to break up with my girlfriend because I feel unappreciated. She fell asleep while I was attempting this. FML

#18225112
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30435) - you deserved it (4038)

On 11/12/2011 at 1:41am - love - by kirrby - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39115) - you deserved it (7741)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML

#18209782
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29647) - you deserved it (6936)

On 11/10/2011 at 12:07pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ireland (Cork)



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