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chatoyant

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2423
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About chatoyant : Instagram @linfaa

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chatoyant's favorite FMLs

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

#18733573
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19953) - you deserved it (39234)

On 01/07/2012 at 5:27am - intimacy - by Danny - Australia

Today, my therapist told me, "I'm sorry, but I'm not qualified to handle your level of instability." FML

#18725353
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35201) - you deserved it (4254)

On 01/06/2012 at 11:16am - health - by Ixi_the_pixie - United States

Today, my older brother burst into my bedroom at 4 am to show me photos of sushi. FML

Today, I told my parents that I wanted to donate blood. My dad helpfully interjected, "Sorry, they don't accept blood from gingers." FML

#18678605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29501) - you deserved it (7709)

On 01/01/2012 at 8:22pm - health - by GingerJ (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

#18626435
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42203) - you deserved it (8109)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I walked into my elderly grandmother's trailer, used the bathroom and went to wash my hands. She had a soft spot in the floor that she covered with a bathmat. I fell through. Right leg up to my hip in the floor, boobs stuck on the counter. My husband and grandmother stood there laughing. FML

#18624537
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23780) - you deserved it (2678)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I noticed that my girlfriend has a deeper voice than I do. FML

#18613086
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28938) - you deserved it (7237)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:17am - love - by Cary (man) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my boyfriend told me that I can no longer sleep over at his house because his cat doesn't like it. FML

#18573641
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27958) - you deserved it (3923)

On 12/21/2011 at 8:41pm - animals - by kaipodable - United States (California)

Today, I found out while skiing that my dad likes to call me Pimple because I have a pink coat and white helmet. He has tried to squeeze me. FML

#18561191
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21703) - you deserved it (4983)

On 12/20/2011 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I heard someone calling my name. It was my neighbor. Turns out they named their dogs after my mother, my sister and me. FML

#18560105
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28508) - you deserved it (3048)

On 12/20/2011 at 6:49am - misc - by IHopeYourDogsGetDiarrheaAndPoopOnYourBed (woman) - Mauritius

Today, while sleeping, my foot was stabbed by something in my bed and I woke up to it bleeding. I looked around for the cause and found nothing. Now I'm afraid to go to sleep because it might happen again. FML

#18550931
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29458) - you deserved it (2385)

On 12/19/2011 at 2:35am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada

Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and instead of saying goodbye, I got tongue-tied and said, "I love you, boo." FML

#18546937
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13747) - you deserved it (26471)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:36pm - misc - by Musicfreak (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML

#18525865
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25994) - you deserved it (12589)

On 12/16/2011 at 4:08am - kids - by Oily (man) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, while pulling into my driveway, I slightly bumped into something. My wife. I'll be sleeping on the couch for a while. FML

#18474194
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23802) - you deserved it (18614)

On 12/10/2011 at 3:45am - intimacy - by godhatesme (man) - United States

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11438) - you deserved it (88868)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States



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