About chatoyant : Instagram @linfaa
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chatoyant's favorite FMLs
Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML
by aliezzedine / 02/02/2012 at 6:32am / Lebanon / Miscellaneous
by Random / 01/31/2012 at 9:41am / United States / Love
by RequilaRainbow / 01/26/2012 at 2:34am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 01/23/2012 at 7:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my kids to visit their grandma. At one point while playing, my youngest said "shit", so I admonished her. My mom snorted and told me to "stop being such a little bitch", because it will make my kids into "lame prisses like their mother". FML
by gloria77 / 01/23/2012 at 6:26pm / United States / Kids
by antwo / 01/21/2012 at 11:50pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, while looking in the mirror at my full-blown grease-spewing acne-riddled face, my father came up behind me and said, "Don't worry son, I had acne like that when I was your age". I replied, "No you didn't", and his immediate response while laughing was, "No, I didn't." FML
by harshdoobie / 01/18/2012 at 10:18am / Canada / Health
Today, when I excitedly announced to my mother-in-law that I was pregnant, she looked at me with a blank expression and asked me who the father was. She's 45. She's not senile or suffering from dementia, but apparently just suffering from being a chronic bitch. FML
by littlelottie / 01/17/2012 at 12:04pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 01/16/2012 at 2:55pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, while I was peacefully sleeping, I felt a hand suddenly slap my forehead. Then fingers began to press against my mouth, then nose, then eyes. I finally woke up to my girlfriend laughing hysterically. She'd confused me with her clock-radio. FML
by ohlordhelpmenow / 01/14/2012 at 10:54pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by iheartmorons / 01/14/2012 at 9:31am / United Kingdom (London) / Love
by shitttyyyday / 01/14/2012 at 2:47am / United States / Health
by mortifiedgrandchild / 01/09/2012 at 1:53pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, my fiancé called and hung up right after I answered. He called back 5 minutes later demanding to know the name of the man who answered my phone. This "man" was me. I have bronchitis. Yes, he's aware of this. FML
by Anonymous / 01/08/2012 at 1:23am / United States / Health
- Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found… Today, my plans for having sex with my girlfriend were thwarted for the sixth time in a row by my… Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told…