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cerealman

Offline (the 12/20/2014 at 6:26am) | Search for a member

cerealman

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2826
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About cerealman : Uhm, 15 almost 16. I love music, no joke. That's about it. I'm a pretty boring person I guess.

Never mind. I'm 16 now.
Never mind. 17 now.
Never mind. 18 now.

cerealman's page activity

Visits<b>ty7in_topic</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 2:55am<b>AlonsoKold</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 8:24pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 4:48pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 1:18am<b>Giuls</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 4:56pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 7:32am

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of cerealman's badges

cerealman's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, I was watching Ratatouille. Piece of advice for starving students: never watch it when you've only eaten two apples in two days, or you'll find yourself in the ridiculous position of being jealous of a fucking rat. FML

#21033122
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39943) - you deserved it (7409)

On 01/19/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by I.Want.Food. (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML

#21032373
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43758) - you deserved it (6354)

On 01/19/2014 at 12:17am - kids - by MommyProblems (woman) - United States

Today, I puked up an anti-nausea pill. FML

#21026645
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49637) - you deserved it (4490)

On 01/13/2014 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, after his sixth beer, my dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven you for what you did to your mother's vagina". FML

#21025234
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56697) - you deserved it (5697)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was getting ready for a night out with the girls, and without any hint of trickery, just wanting an honest answer, I asked my boyfriend how I looked in the dress I chose. He immediately dropped to his knees, yelled, "NOOOOOOOOO!" and calmly left the room. FML

#21024776
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37722) - you deserved it (8281)

On 01/11/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by -_-" (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I've had my tenth "Christmas" dinner since Christmas last took place. My mum has gone nuts and keeps playing Christmas music, making these dinners, and refusing to let me take down the Christmas decorations. My dad is too whipped to save us from this hell. FML

#21016807
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44160) - you deserved it (4262)

On 01/04/2014 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I decided to light a lantern and watch it fly with my girlfriend after midnight. The neighbor's tree caught fire. FML

#21012276
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36516) - you deserved it (12047)

On 01/01/2014 at 12:17am - misc - by claubea11 - Puerto Rico

Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML

#21009563
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39329) - you deserved it (4015)

On 12/29/2013 at 6:23pm - misc - by Kayak (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to basically ground my own husband, after he tricked our 6-year-old son into getting his tongue stuck to a frozen pole. FML

#21000259
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41367) - you deserved it (4402)

On 12/21/2013 at 2:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden

Today, I was laying in the grass, staring into the blue sky and watching planes go by. My boyfriend snuggles down next to me; it was a sweet moment. He then told me all about how the planes above are leaving 'chem trails', and that he believes the CIA is out to mind-control us all. Right. FML

#20998520
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33732) - you deserved it (5262)

On 12/19/2013 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my teenage daughter found out that she's pregnant, but insists she's still a virgin. Who does she think knocked her up? God? FML

#20996030
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54830) - you deserved it (7211)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Egypt

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

#20989946
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47193) - you deserved it (5537)

On 12/12/2013 at 6:27am - love - by Rumors - United States (Wisconsin)



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