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cerealman

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cerealman

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2366
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About cerealman : Uhm, 15 almost 16. I love music, no joke. That's about it. I'm a pretty boring person I guess.

Never mind. I'm 16 now.
Never mind. 17 now.
Never mind. 18 now.

cerealman's page activity

Visits<b>ty7in_topic</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 2:55am<b>AlonsoKold</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 8:24pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 4:48pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 1:18am<b>Giuls</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 4:56pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 7:32am

cerealman's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of cerealman's badges

cerealman's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom called to chew me out for having my sister arrested. My sister broke into my apartment, rearranged my living room, and claimed she now lived with me. She then threatened me with a butcher's knife for not appreciating what she had done. My mom wants me to pay the bail. FML

#19884123
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33693) - you deserved it (2263)

On 07/03/2012 at 1:36am - misc - by needmorelocks - United States (California)

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

#19870672
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49803) - you deserved it (2274)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:48am - health - by Jobby (woman) -

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML

#19848904
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8902) - you deserved it (27363)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:18am - work - by cmck932012 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML

#19848843
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24861) - you deserved it (5347)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I received an acceptance letter to Juilliard. After showing it to my mom, she tells me I can't attend because Robin Williams graduated from Juilliard, and he now has too much facial hair. FML

#19838492
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27748) - you deserved it (1863)

On 06/24/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by A.W (woman) - United States

Today, a police officer came to talk to the kids at my workplace. He asked what they wanted to hear about first. A group of them shouted, "The donuts, tells us about the donuts." Apparently these idiots are the future of my country. FML

#19812468
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19884) - you deserved it (4405)

On 06/19/2012 at 12:08pm - kids - by Joseph N - United States

Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML

#19806269
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28676) - you deserved it (2887)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States

Today, I was at work when a co-worker decided it would be funny to email me from my boss's computer to tell me I had been laid off. It wasn't funny when I was fired for real after "skipping work without giving notice." FML

#19805072
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29338) - you deserved it (2072)

On 06/18/2012 at 12:39am - work - by Adam Jensen - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML

#19772012
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24573) - you deserved it (3306)

On 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by amidreaming?? (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I saw Thor and I wanted to see how realistic it was to be swinging a hammer around. Wrong idea. I ended up unconscious on the ground for ten whole minutes. FML

#19753882
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5370) - you deserved it (36331)

On 06/08/2012 at 4:09am - misc - by runner2731 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got a lecture about being lazy and not being active enough for my age, which ended with, "When I was your age, I was out every night having sex with anything that breathed." Thanks Gran. FML

#19745357
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25865) - you deserved it (3224)

On 06/06/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by BrianTheLion89 - United States

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

#19719129
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36018) - you deserved it (2601)

On 06/02/2012 at 1:43am - misc - by ironyisabitch - United States (California)

Today, a homeless guy grabbed me and started ranting that "the Mayans were right" or some shit. He was making about as much sense as Charlie Sheen outside of a padded cell, so I shoved him away. That's when he decided to pull a knife and chase me all the way to my car. FML

#19716436
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23599) - you deserved it (3773)

On 06/01/2012 at 5:08pm - misc - by kay (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I was driving home, when some kid on a motorbike shot in front of me from the pavement, almost running me off the road. When I confronted him, he screamed, "Watch where you're going next time!" If I could flush every last one of these human turds from the toilet of life, I would. FML

#19698892
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18023) - you deserved it (3034)

On 05/29/2012 at 1:10pm - misc - by cunting cunts (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, I went to visit my husband's grave. I was unable to mourn in peace because some teenagers were smoking pot and talking about a government conspiracy "to change the way gravity works" on the next grave over. FML

#19696168
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33223) - you deserved it (1879)

On 05/28/2012 at 10:51pm - misc - by notnicefools - United States (California)



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