About cerealman : Uhm, 15 almost 16. I love music, no joke. That's about it. I'm a pretty boring person I guess.
Never mind. I'm 16 now.
Never mind. 17 now.
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Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16402) - you deserved it (4602)
On 12/18/2011 at 8:52pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40323) - you deserved it (1581)
On 12/18/2011 at 2:44am - work - by Sedici - United States
Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (27871) - you deserved it (4963)
On 12/16/2011 at 9:29pm - kids - by DocBastard (man) - Reserved
Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19793) - you deserved it (1768)
On 12/15/2011 at 1:57am - work - by Username - United States (California)
Today, a Karate dojo opened under my apartment. It's like living in a Bruce Lee movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17827) - you deserved it (2023)
On 12/15/2011 at 12:09am - misc - by rattlingfloorboards (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, after trying to find the perfect picture for the guy I have a huge crush on, I finally found one and sent it to him. His return picture? Himself in a Batman mask and sombrero. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14509) - you deserved it (8533)
On 12/15/2011 at 12:00am - love - by scribbles1475 (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35342) - you deserved it (623)
On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States
Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35342) - you deserved it (623)
On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States
Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8557) - you deserved it (66038)
On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States
Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10104) - you deserved it (30023)
On 12/07/2011 at 9:46am - misc - by Notadrinkanddriveidiot - United States
Today, I started at my new waitressing job. Our uniforms have the name of the restaurant on the left chest pocket. My first customer asked me what the other boob’s called. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20244) - you deserved it (2021)
On 12/06/2011 at 7:26am - work - by boobywaitress (woman) - Australia
Today, my parents bought purity rings for my twin brother and me for our birthday, and had them blessed by our priest. Neither of us are virgins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34563) - you deserved it (7881)
On 12/05/2011 at 12:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47421) - you deserved it (4251) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, after recently moving to America as I've always dreamt of, I saw my first, majestic deer. My boyfriend slammed it with the rental car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21282) - you deserved it (2430)
On 12/01/2011 at 12:41am - misc - by AmericanDream (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I went to a nursing home to sing Christmas carols to the elderly. They threw their bananas at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20587) - you deserved it (4371)
On 11/29/2011 at 7:42am - work - by robincakes94 - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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