cdncw

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Offline (the 01/18/2016 at 7:49pm)

cdncw

30Fucked!

cdncwcdncw
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 March 1982 (34 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1936
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About cdncw : I live in Canada.
I like laughing at the misfortunes of others.
My cats are my family:
Don't be shy, say hi.

cdncw's page activity

Visits<b>kkows25</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 7:19pm<b>footinthemouth07</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 9:23am<b>zenos82</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 11:27am<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 08/12/2016 at 9:28am<b>Sj1147</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 10:14am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 1:14pm<b>Excalibur6669</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 7:20pm<b>DarthHypno</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 2:11am<b>sated_child</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 10:44pm<b>kelly20</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 10:25pm<b>madi10647</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 1:27pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 1:17am<b>larrypoppins</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 8:22pm<b>amburbuds</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 6:13pm<b>kingshelly</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 5:44am<b>leannez</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 9:59pm<b>demix</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 8:37pm<b>aj105</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 6:25pm

Fucked!<b>kelly20</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 4:26am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 9:48pm<b>HylianTwilight</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 8:00am<b>littleteapot</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 6:59pm<b>NessieMonster188</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 10:42pm<b>TiggyBonkers</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 1:46am<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 5:38pm<b>NoOrdinaryNZer</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 12:15pm<b>Sydney1600</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 3:51am<b>hard_candy</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 8:27pm<b>newyearstandup</b> - the 06/22/2015 at 8:34am<b>kutchbabe</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 8:20pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 5:16am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:21pm<b>sprigs_</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 11:59pm<b>LilyLi</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 10:10pm<b>dieana</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 10:15am<b>EliTheAdorable</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 9:50pm

cdncw's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of cdncw's badges

cdncw's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

by syl / 02/11/2010 at 1:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I was in the car with my 16 year old daughter. There was a guy on a fast looking motorcycle next to me at the stop light. I yelled to him to "get it up!" so that he would do a wheelie. Just before the light turned green he yelled back, "You're too old for me, but I'll get it up for her!" FML

by Anonymous / 02/05/2010 at 1:18am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

by chanclepants / 01/27/2010 at 8:35am / Intimacy

Today, I took a picture of my "privates" on my girlfriends cell phone and set it as her background without her knowing. Minutes later, I heard her mom scream. She has the same phone. FML

by masterzach21 / 01/22/2010 at 1:25am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

by Jon / 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

by BathroomMuch / 12/25/2009 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I slipped as I was about to take a shower, knocking myself out cold. I woke up to someone banging on my door. It was a cop checking to see if I was okay. When I asked how he knew to come, he said he was notified by "a male neighbor who called anonymously." I guess I have a peeping Tom. FML

by ThatAintLogical / 12/18/2009 at 3:46pm / United States (Louisiana) / Health

Today, I looked at my house in Google Street View for the first time and noticed an unfamiliar vehicle in the driveway. When I asked my wife about it, she admitted to have an ongoing affair. Apparently the entire world knew my wife was having an affair before I did. FML

by cheaters_should_die / 12/18/2009 at 9:31am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I called my boyfriend upset because my best friend has begun stripping to pay for school. His response was, "Where and what time does she work?" FML

by notcool / 12/15/2009 at 4:49pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, I found out that me and my best friend are both pregnant. We live together, and both had one night stands with the same guy. Now we are going to be each raising his children in the same house while he has decided to "not get involved" and move to a different state. FML

by anonymous / 12/03/2009 at 1:55am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I realized that I'm a sleepwalker and for the past week, that dream where I was giving my roommate a blowjob was real. He just pretended it never happened. FML

by chacha / 11/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend that since I lost my job I can't afford a Christmas present for him, or anyone. He said trying anal would be fine. FML

by ehwat / 11/26/2009 at 12:31am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my mother cheated on my father. It turns out she had a drunken one night stand with the manager of the restaurant that my parents own and that I work at. The same manager I have been secretly sleeping with for over six months. FML

by Anonymous / 11/12/2009 at 1:27am / United States (Montana) / Intimacy

Today, a woman evidently posted on a chat website asking for any young men to send pictures of their junk to her cell phone. Over 60 messages were sent, mostly by underage boys, most of them including the picture. Only problem. The number posted wasn't hers... It was mine. I'm a 21 year old guy. FML

by buckid310 / 11/03/2009 at 4:17pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy