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carkel

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carkel

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 25 August 1993 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1534
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About carkel : Yo. Go ahead and make up your own backround story of me. You probably know me better.

carkel's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 3:08pm<b>CameronWilkins</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 10:06am<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 11:57pm<b>quickfingers100</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 3:31am<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 8:13pm<b>SadMansSandwich</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 7:02pm<b>robbie12321</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 7:50pm<b>kingofswedes</b> - the 12/25/2012 at 3:51am<b>devil_laugh</b> - the 05/30/2012 at 3:49pm<b>jakeshade11</b> - the 10/11/2011 at 9:08pm<b>FMyProfile</b> - the 09/01/2010 at 11:48am<b>Feverrotes</b> - the 04/27/2010 at 4:14am<b>allmidnighteyes</b> - the 02/13/2010 at 11:49pm<b>HJB</b> - the 02/11/2010 at 1:06pm<b>crazysicknasty</b> - the 02/10/2010 at 9:08pm<b>CheshireHalli</b> - the 02/10/2010 at 4:47pm<b>Beesh</b> - the 02/10/2010 at 11:34am<b>germanguy10</b> - the 02/06/2010 at 11:31am

carkel's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

carkel's favorite FMLs

Today, at a restaurant, I ordered the best chocolate soufflé on the menu, which was called "Double Satisfaction". The waiter asked me what would I like to order. The words that came out of my mouth were "Double Orgasm". FML

#14796617
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17688) - you deserved it (37615)

On 02/01/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theshameofit (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. He got on the bed on all fours and crawled towards me, saying "My precious... my precious" in Gollum's voice. FML

#13782516
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38140) - you deserved it (6910)

On 11/09/2010 at 9:10pm - intimacy - by single (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad asked me if I could convince my mother to get a Brazillian wax. If that's not bad enough, my mother heard and yelled from the other room, "I like my furball." FML

#9041294
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32431) - you deserved it (2332)

On 03/13/2010 at 5:35am - intimacy - by Grossed Out - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that I was not adopted and in fact my parents are my biological parents. How did I find out? Over dinner. How long have I been believing I was adopted? 22 years. Why did I start believing I was adopted? My siblings thought it would be a funny joke. My mom played along. FML

#8124338
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42648) - you deserved it (2968)

On 02/11/2010 at 7:22am - misc - by Biological (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

#8045354
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45031) - you deserved it (3035)

On 02/09/2010 at 7:22am - health - by SickSmick (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I got married. My mother told me to stop being difficult, because she was the mother of the bride, and it was her day to shine. FML

#7845812
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36228) - you deserved it (2582)

On 02/03/2010 at 12:58pm - love - by bluebride (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to a dress up party. The theme was pirates and prostitutes. At the door I was handed a voucher that said: 'Thank you for dressing up. Collect your free drink at the bar.' I didn't dress up. FML

#7839912
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7200) - you deserved it (33547)

On 02/03/2010 at 3:42am - misc - by notaprossie (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I woke up in the hospital. I had apparently overworked my heart so much that I fainted. What caused it? I was playing a racing game on my Wii and freaked out when I won first place. FML

#7789192
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12914) - you deserved it (33869)

On 02/01/2010 at 7:40pm - health - by overexcited (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I'm in the hospital because I sliced my leg open. Why? I jumped off my bed and scratched myself on the metal bed frame when Miss America was crowned to Miss Virginia. I'm 20 years old, and a man. FML

#7744599
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7310) - you deserved it (29406)

On 01/31/2010 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

#7139059
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26113) - you deserved it (6631)

On 01/04/2010 at 1:43am - health - by sadface (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I woke up after drunkenly hooking up with a girl who was really into Twilight. I felt bruises on the lower end of my neck and so I went to the mirror and checked it out. She bit me, 5 times. FML

#6392894
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12568) - you deserved it (34128)

On 11/21/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by jibberish (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to find my house TP'd. I also noticed our entire house was devoid of toilet paper. Someone had broken in just to steal our toilet paper and TP our own house with it. FML

#6382728
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29680) - you deserved it (2629)

On 11/20/2009 at 6:50pm - misc - by WhyTheEff (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found a gift card under my bed that I lost a few months ago for $400 to a store that went out of business last week. FML

#6342869
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32272) - you deserved it (11495)

On 11/17/2009 at 4:19pm - money - by fmfl (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my band played for our school. We were cheered for and everything. Being the lead singer I tried to look cool and push the mic away and pull it back by pushing down the bottom of the stand with my foot. It hit my face and I bled like crazy but I kept singing. No one clapped at the end. FML

#6297066
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8847) - you deserved it (33312)

On 11/14/2009 at 2:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)



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