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carelessnymph

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carelessnymph
  • Town/Country : Ottawa, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 July 1988 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 401
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About carelessnymph : well, 3rd year uni student just trying to kill some time, and what better way then on FML?

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carelessnymph's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

I agree, your life sucks (23114) - you deserved it (8373)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:51pm - kids - by Mikabe (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, I went out for pizza with my boyfriend. He loaned me his debit card and loudly announced in front of everyone that his pin code was the numerical equivalent of "Fart", and repeated it twice, just in case I hadn't heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks (16894) - you deserved it (2591)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:14am - misc - by datingamoron (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (37735) - you deserved it (7269)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

#14965591 (195)

I agree, your life sucks (9825) - you deserved it (34588)

On 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm - misc - by NotAsToughAsHeThinks (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML

#14961230 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (33016) - you deserved it (6662)

On 02/13/2011 at 5:32pm - intimacy - by Katrina (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I put up an ad on Craig's List to find a best friend. I don't know what's more pathetic: looking for a best friend online, or the ad being removed almost instantly. FML

I agree, your life sucks (8586) - you deserved it (18120)

On 02/13/2011 at 4:06pm - misc - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to say a deep sincere speech on assembly in front of the whole college on the recent floods in Queensland. Instead of saying "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked down, we get back up" I stumbled and said "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked up..." FML

I agree, your life sucks (17558) - you deserved it (3602)

On 02/13/2011 at 5:00am - misc - by knockedup (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML

#13841741 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (38314) - you deserved it (1624)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, I was walking back to campus with my boyfriend when we passed an Irish pub called "Fat Belly's." He put his arm around me, patted my stomach, and said "Yay! It's your restaurant!" FML

I agree, your life sucks (19278) - you deserved it (4716)

On 11/14/2010 at 1:54pm - love - by freedomofmusic (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

#13823528 (246)

I agree, your life sucks (43367) - you deserved it (6090)

On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, a girl I like came over to my house because I'd promised to help her prepare for a maths test. My mom thought it would be funny to put a stack of porn magazines and handcuffs on the table in my room when I went to open the door. FML

#13673921 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (25465) - you deserved it (2828)

On 11/01/2010 at 11:10am - intimacy - by crazy_mom (man) - United States (Colorado)



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