Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

captainPIRATEche

Search for a member

captainPIRATEche

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 16 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1021
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About captainPIRATEche : HeyHiHello! ^~^
my name is CHEYANNA! i live in las vegas nevada! :D
i like to have fun and party♥ haha.
and and talk to people soo come talk to meee!
dont be scared if you look at my profile say hi!!
add me on facebook: facebook.com/captainPIRATEcheyanna

captainPIRATEche's page activity

Visits<b>kkong343</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 10:39am<b>happilymarried27</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 1:29am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:25pm<b>buzz18</b> - the 04/02/2011 at 12:06am<b>fluffingclouds</b> - the 02/10/2011 at 4:54pm<b>Evii</b> - the 01/25/2011 at 10:45pm<b>Lisa_Gaskarth</b> - the 01/22/2011 at 12:33pm<b>kmwis_00</b> - the 01/17/2011 at 4:06pm<b>MinusJuliet</b> - the 01/03/2011 at 2:43am<b>2hoesNaBagel</b> - the 12/22/2010 at 11:59am<b>newzealand</b> - the 11/14/2010 at 5:30am<b>A83</b> - the 09/26/2010 at 9:22pm<b>OMGJohnMayer</b> - the 09/26/2010 at 2:50am<b>dirtynsweet</b> - the 09/22/2010 at 9:09pm<b>teoriginalG</b> - the 09/20/2010 at 9:14am<b>the_flirtt</b> - the 09/20/2010 at 2:09am<b>livers210</b> - the 09/19/2010 at 2:37pm<b>greyy_goooose</b> - the 09/19/2010 at 1:19pm

captainPIRATEche's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

captainPIRATEche's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

#15261290
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45876) - you deserved it (8714)

On 03/10/2011 at 10:08am - intimacy - by Anon (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was in class when all of a sudden I was hit in the head by a metal pencil case. My teacher threw it at me to get my attention. FML

#14908981
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16435) - you deserved it (31078)

On 02/09/2011 at 1:02pm - health - by ouch - United States (Washington)

Today, I was in class when all of a sudden I was hit in the head by a metal pencil case. My teacher threw it at me to get my attention. FML

#14908981
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16435) - you deserved it (31078)

On 02/09/2011 at 1:02pm - health - by ouch - United States (Washington)

Today, I got into a car accident. Why? I was distracted by a floating spec of dust and was pretending I was in space. FML

#14696721
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7767) - you deserved it (58208)

On 01/24/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by moxy -

Today, I was at the grocery store with my dad. He let out a very silent but foul abomination of a fart. The people behind us started gagging, so he turned, pointed at me and said "That was my daughter." FML

#14622916
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31501) - you deserved it (3366)

On 01/18/2011 at 3:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend kept trying to convince me to do anal with him. After denying him several times he told me "Why it feels good, trust me." I asked him how would he know. There was a long awkward silence when he then replied with "I'm not gay I swear." FML

#7563904
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30560) - you deserved it (4348)

On 01/25/2010 at 3:47am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

#7339757
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27186) - you deserved it (4922)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

#3950301
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75132) - you deserved it (6074)

On 07/22/2009 at 10:12am - intimacy - by Gordon (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were on the phone. He started talking dirty, and saying how horny he was, etc. So I decided to play along and said "I want you to picture me naked, baby." All of a sudden I heard a huge sigh. He responded, "Ew, that just killed it." FML

#3925036
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62135) - you deserved it (11464)

On 07/21/2009 at 6:42am - intimacy - by picturemenakedbaby (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was working in the liquor store, I was trying to impress my hot boss by lifting three cases of Grey goose. Turns out I can't, and I'll be working for the next two months of the rest of my summer paying it all back. FML

#2900740
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7881) - you deserved it (55276)

On 06/15/2009 at 12:13am - work - by damgoose (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

#2532710
1165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82252) - you deserved it (218715)

On 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm - animals - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
436 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31908) - you deserved it (141187)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: