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capnbzarr

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capnbzarr

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 November 1982 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1961
  • Number of comments : 451
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About capnbzarr : Sometimes, there's a man.

capnbzarr's page activity

Visits<b>GoodOptions</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 11:00pm<b>MrKrueger</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 9:58am<b>theacuna</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 11:28pm<b>FanOfAnimations</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 12:27am<b>lillord55</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 12:22am<b>swick25</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 10:24pm<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 3:57am<b>DildoFaggins</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 2:23am<b>beerlaoisawesome</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 9:16am<b>Killerbee442</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 3:31am<b>chinaski7628</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 2:36am<b>GarrettP28</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 11:07pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 9:55pm<b>wilwonks</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 9:23pm<b>metallica_wins</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 8:52pm<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 8:50pm<b>pimp_named_mitch</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 12:41am<b>davlosthisid42</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 7:07am

capnbzarr's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Seen it!

You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of capnbzarr's badges

capnbzarr's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm in Spain, and told the kids with whom I will be working that I was excited to be working with them. Only the form of excitement I used apparently refers to sexual excitement. Basically, I told the kids I was sexually aroused to be working with them. FML

#30294
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42840) - you deserved it (12747)

On 02/12/2009 at 7:14am - intimacy - by thegoldenboy3 (man) - Spain (Andalucia)

Today, I was at the strip club. I put my dollar on the stage. When the stripper came over to take it, she stood me up and flipped my tits and said I had bigger ones than her. I'm a guy. FML

#7993
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21241) - you deserved it (40477)

On 02/04/2009 at 12:40pm - intimacy - by Big B (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend asked if her friend Alex from high school could join in with us and we could have an amazing threesome. As a horny dude how could I say no? Turns out Alex is also a guys name. FML

#5350
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14656) - you deserved it (61742)

On 02/02/2009 at 11:29am - intimacy - by Randy Savage (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my nephew asked me how babies are made. I thought he'd had this chat with his mom, but I went in to it again. After a 20 minute 'discussion', he says "So what about the good stuff - get to the blowjobs and the lesbians." He's 11. FML

#3221
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29714) - you deserved it (3246)

On 01/28/2009 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by epistaxis - Australia (Queensland)

Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML

#2256
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58537) - you deserved it (7765)

On 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by TheEnglishOne - United States (California)

Today, I was hitting on a girl that was getting ready to walk into the same class as I. We were waiting outside the room, and I told her that I heard the Professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down in a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML

#2109
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9340) - you deserved it (30985)

On 01/21/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by footinmouth - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was having a cybersex chat with a "girl" on a website whilst at work. I noticed my colleague who sits next to me start cracking up with laughter. Turned out it was him I was chatting with and he was winding me up. Worst thing is it had given me a stiffy. FML

#1065
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10123) - you deserved it (46519)

On 01/14/2009 at 3:49am - intimacy - by diddlysquat - United Kingdom (Wakefield)

Today, I got together with a small gathering of friends in a bar. I go up to the bar to order something, but with all the music and noise, the barman can't hear what I'm trying to say, so he leans forward, cocking his ear towards me. For some reason, I thought he was being friendly so I kissed him as if we were saying hello to each other. FML

#1056
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8924) - you deserved it (17216)

On 01/14/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Ad-s - Sent from mobile version

Today, I signed up on one of those "cheater" dating sites. I ended up meeting my own girlfriend. FML

#798
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13536) - you deserved it (69122)

On 01/07/2009 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by Lou Czar - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was baby-sitting four rather noisy and rowdy kids. After a two hour struggle, I finally manage to get them into bed. I then ask them what they want before going to sleep, and the eldest replies: "Can you tell us a story where you die at the end?" FML

#624
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29230) - you deserved it (2590)

On 12/29/2008 at 5:56am - kids - by Hellau - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML

#606
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34587) - you deserved it (20879)

On 12/26/2008 at 11:07pm - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, feeling romantic and overwhelmed with love, I told my fiancée: "I don't know what I'd do without you." She replied: "Well, you'd wank". FML

#591
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22442) - you deserved it (5380)

On 12/25/2008 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Nicos - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boss asked me "can I give you some constructive criticism?". I said yes. He tells me "Your work is really shit. You have no talent and I can't figure out why I hired you." FML

#576
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24652) - you deserved it (3027)

On 12/22/2008 at 11:18pm - work - by crapules - Sent from mobile version

Today, someone stole both rear view mirrors from my scooter. And where was the police? They were 500m down the road, waiting to stop me for not having any mirrors. FML

#569
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26250) - you deserved it (1696)

On 12/22/2008 at 12:43am - money - by daddy - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

#552
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50957) - you deserved it (6190)

On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version



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