Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

capnbzarr

Online | Search for a member

capnbzarr

6Fucked!

capnbzarrcapnbzarr
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 23 November 1982 (32 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3389
  • Number of comments : 535
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About capnbzarr : Sometimes, there's a man.

capnbzarr's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 1:13pm<b>mr_dour</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 12:39am<b>cbxxii</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:19pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 2:10am<b>Yorih17</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 9:16am<b>SarahSehhati</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 2:52pm<b>Lorenzo1102</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 7:29pm<b>jkp1291</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 3:29pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 10:46am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 8:33am<b>thatoneguy1111</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 6:44am<b>Clinky92</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 3:22am<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 6:44pm<b>nachtii</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 11:05pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 6:19am<b>Purexinsanity</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 4:53pm<b>SteamyPenguin</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 10:45pm<b>Palindromesque</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 5:25pm

Fucked!<b>saraitkddh</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 2:01pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:44am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 3:36am<b>pixie158</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 7:46pm<b>watermelon15</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:30pm

capnbzarr's FML badges

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of capnbzarr's badges

capnbzarr's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to quit smoking. My wife conveniently decided on the same day that she was going to start smoking. FML

#19085409
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28191) - you deserved it (3089)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:50pm - health - by TerribleAddiction - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

#19072659
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35919) - you deserved it (2720)

On 02/14/2012 at 9:29am - love - by Illinoisgirl - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, after I spent nearly three hours building an igloo, my dog decided it would be a nice to enter it and take a shit. FML

#19032075
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24387) - you deserved it (3637)

On 02/09/2012 at 1:37am - animals - by A (woman) - United States

Today, I bought my mother an apple pie. She made a face at it and said that she'd decided to go on a diet. After I'd left the house, she put it in the oven, forgot about it, and burnt it to a crisp. She then called me up to inform me that I'd wasted my money, and to get her "another damn pie." FML

#19024888
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22060) - you deserved it (1704)

On 02/08/2012 at 6:27am - misc - by 3.14 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my fiancé has decided to become my cat's personal trainer. This includes talking to the cat, attempting to motivate him to run up and down the stairs and telling the cat to call him "Coach Daddy". I now have a crazy fiancé and a very angry cat. FML

#18998575
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24175) - you deserved it (4553)

On 02/05/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by oh.geez (woman) - United States

Today, after my credit card was stolen, the thief made donations to charitable associations. Now I feel bad for asking for the money back. FML

#18973351
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36622) - you deserved it (3548)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:35pm - money - by zobara - Switzerland

Today, at school, I was crying because someone I knew had died. My teacher pulled me aside and said, "I understand you're socially awkward, but don't worry it gets better." FML

#18914321
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34982) - you deserved it (2639)

On 01/26/2012 at 6:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while waiting outside a liquor store for my boyfriend, a drunk guy leaned over my shoulder, took a large bite out of my burger, and walked away. FML

#18913819
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29632) - you deserved it (4028)

On 01/26/2012 at 2:34am - misc - by RequilaRainbow - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML

#18907383
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38025) - you deserved it (5206)

On 01/25/2012 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by wish.was.single (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's -20°C outside. Half way through my thirty minutes walk to work, my boss pulled up beside me in her car, said "You look cold. I'll see you at work." And then drove away. FML

#18898578
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37229) - you deserved it (2967)

On 01/24/2012 at 1:07pm - work - by emma209 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to the sound of a Suburban crashing through my fence and striking the tree in my front yard. After filling out the police report, the driver repeatedly asked me to give him a lift to work. He seemed confused by my speechlessness. FML

#18880054
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24849) - you deserved it (2049)

On 01/22/2012 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found out that when you are sitting on a full bench at a bus stop, some crazy person will come sit on you. FML

#18857605
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23982) - you deserved it (2605)

On 01/19/2012 at 10:46pm - misc - by BadassRumbleroar - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

#18845928
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40493) - you deserved it (6355)

On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML

#18829619
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41342) - you deserved it (9759)

On 01/16/2012 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML

#18813229
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30769) - you deserved it (24091)

On 01/15/2012 at 7:52am - intimacy - by joeshmoe - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: