capitalone

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capitalone

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 15 January 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 915
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About capitalone : Hey, I'm 15. I love sports and biking, I'm very fit. I go on FML when I'm bored. As of now, Avenged Sevenfold is the greatest band ever! R.I.P Jimmy "The Rev" Sullivan. A7X foREVer! :)

capitalone's page activity

Visits<b>lilmisstif</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 12:07am<b>kayms0</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 4:30am<b>night_and_day</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 3:57pm<b>jill97</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 2:16pm<b>aqmalone</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 1:06am<b>sullysair123</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 9:39pm<b>nerovetsrethca</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 4:38pm<b>kkkey</b> - the 03/18/2015 at 2:15pm<b>mhterp90</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 3:09pm<b>stargazer091</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 9:04am<b>madmaddi147</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 4:41pm<b>NWO666</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 3:23am<b>mollyjynxjax</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 2:56pm<b>miztigers53</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 8:21pm<b>reneetlovesyou</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 2:33am<b>ritz24683</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 2:25am<b>emilycb93</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 11:56pm<b>CassSomething</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 1:23am

Fucked!<b>kayms0</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 10:31am

capitalone's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

capitalone's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

by Ouch / 04/25/2011 at 3:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, after receiving the third call this week from teachers about my son falling asleep in class, I decided that it would be a good idea to hide his Xbox controllers. He decided it would be a good idea to hide my diabetes medication. FML

by bbedlock / 04/16/2011 at 8:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML

by Artic / 04/12/2011 at 12:00am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I went up to a girl at a bus stop and started chatting her up. Her response? "Am I being robbed?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2011 at 2:15am / Mozambique (Maputo) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2011 at 1:26am / Health

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend pulled on my pubes and made 'engine starting' noises. This was his attempt at foreplay. FML

by dahs / 04/03/2011 at 7:27am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, I was in IKEA when my friends and I thought it would be fun to play hide and seek. We all hid; I was in a good hiding spot. Half an hour later, I was still there. I texted my friends to see where they were. They all left to see a movie, and forgot about me. FML

by Nicole / 04/03/2011 at 3:11am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2011 at 12:32am / United States / Love

Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML

by paige / 03/31/2011 at 11:18pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

by ouch / 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm / United States (Arizona) / Love