cantholditin

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cantholditin

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 August 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 288
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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cantholditin's page activity

Visits<b>lorena_510</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 12:30am<b>missalice0306</b> - the 07/22/2012 at 7:16am<b>ISTALINI</b> - the 05/12/2010 at 2:20am

cantholditin's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

cantholditin's favorite FMLs

Today, we were working with infant and adult CPR dummies. After practising flawless CPR on the adult dummy, I announced "And that's how you save someone." Then I tripped on the baby dummy and fell. My co-worker stood up and yelled out, "And that's how you kill a baby." FML

by DUMMIE / 03/03/2010 at 7:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2009 at 8:40pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had lunch with some important potential clients at a fancy restaurant. I really wanted to make a good impression. When the piano music stopped, I started clapping while looking around for the pianist. Apparently, it was a CD. FML

by E.S. / 10/23/2009 at 1:01am / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

by awilson / 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on the bus, when an elderly woman stepped in. She looked too weak to stand. She looked at me with her sad puppy eyes, expecting me to give up my seat for her. I felt sorry and got up. As soon as she sat down, she says, "Ha! Sucker!" She didn't look so cute anymore. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2009 at 12:35am / Australia (Victoria) / Transportation

Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me "have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "you mean with other people?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2009 at 10:46am / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I was pissing in a urinal and I had the urge to sneeze. Unable to hold it, I sneezed and hit my head on a metal beam supporting the urinal. In complete disarray, I had to step back from the urinal while pissing and managed to spray the floor, the wall, and the person next to me. FML

by iliketurtles / 02/24/2009 at 5:57pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous