Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

cannonman1863

Offline (the 11/05/2014 at 3:39am) | Search for a member

cannonman1863

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 May 1981 (33 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 984
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About cannonman1863 : Civil War artillery re-enactor, fan of the Arsenal FC, Boston Red Sox, and Pittsburgh Penguins.

cannonman1863's page activity

Visits<b>jcshadow</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 7:24pm<b>GoodRichPope</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 10:34pm<b>katydid91</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 11:07am<b>perdix</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 10:37am<b>Janiney</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 8:24am<b>DancinL</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 3:20am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 1:11am<b>Sockturtle</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 9:55am<b>ariverperson</b> - the 12/21/2012 at 7:48am<b>ThecomingofTan</b> - the 01/18/2012 at 3:29am

cannonman1863's FML badges

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of cannonman1863's badges

cannonman1863's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML

#18517264
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25780) - you deserved it (2544)

On 12/15/2011 at 1:57am - work - by Username - United States (California)

Today, after getting rear ended by a car, I texted my husband to let him know I was in the hospital. His response? "I'm at Taco Bell." FML

#18515573
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28395) - you deserved it (2987)

On 12/14/2011 at 10:34pm - misc - by Mariah Heimann - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband changed the voice on my car's GPS to Mr T's. I don't know how to change it back. I've been saying, "I pity the fool" over and over again ever since. FML

#18510240
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20815) - you deserved it (4960)

On 12/14/2011 at 9:06am - misc - by annoyed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my daughter to see Santa at the mall. When I went to pick her up from Santa's lap, my watch snagged on his beard, pulling it off in front of my daughter and about twenty kids in line. My daughter still isn't speaking to me. FML

#18460196
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26860) - you deserved it (4487)

On 12/08/2011 at 12:41pm - kids - by childdreamkiller (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while I was putting up Christmas lights, my younger brother wouldn't stop pestering me. It seems he hadn't forgotten the time I gave myself an electric shock last year, and he wanted to see if I'd do it again. FML

#18419129
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20303) - you deserved it (3108)

On 12/03/2011 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

#18418543
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55362) - you deserved it (5534) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/03/2011 at 11:24am - kids - by perenoel - France

Today, I was helping first-graders do school work when one of them stabbed me in the face with a pencil, all because I told her that a three was backwards. FML

#18396492
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27859) - you deserved it (3035)

On 11/30/2011 at 6:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, the recycling bin caught fire. My little brother was "experimenting" with his magnifying glass, set an egg carton on fire and didn't realise you had to put it out before throwing it in the bin. FML

#18354691
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20779) - you deserved it (2063)

On 11/26/2011 at 6:38am - kids - by Annon - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML

#17903490
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28612) - you deserved it (2853)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:18pm - work - by SimpleSwimmer - United States (California)

Today, at work, my boss went to the single-stall bathroom on our floor. The next thing I know, I'm on suspension pending review because some asshole left an upper-decker in the toilet. Since I'm the office prankster, all suspicion is now on me. I've been framed by my own colleagues. FML

#17888360
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18131) - you deserved it (12844)

On 10/02/2011 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

#17884513
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32883) - you deserved it (9229)

On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was installing wireless surveillance cameras outside my workplace. Before mounting them, I pointed them around the building to make sure there was a good signal and picture. I got inside to the monitor just in time to see a kid steal one of the cameras. FML

#17863596
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23089) - you deserved it (2723)

On 09/29/2011 at 1:44pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mother followed me to work to see what I got up to. I'm a fitness instructor in a ground floor gym that has big windows overlooking the street. She stood outside and waved at me for half an hour, while I tried to concentrate on teaching a visibly amused class. FML

#17836220
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21696) - you deserved it (1958)

On 09/26/2011 at 12:28am - work - by Username - United States (Illinois)

Today, while at the bakery section of my local supermarket, I heard the beat of what I assumed was a song playing. I really got into it, and bobbed my head and danced a little. After getting some strange looks, I realized the "beat" was a machine mixing frosting. FML

#15287588
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11666) - you deserved it (37340)

On 03/12/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: